Quote of the Day

We are all a little weird and life's a little weird, and when we find someone whose weirdness is compatible with ours, we join up with them and fall in mutual weirdness and call it love.
- Dr. Seuss

Humour

For me, an essential thing in a friendship is a shared sense of humour, or at least an understanding and appreciation of each other's humour.

I find it very difficult (read: impossible) to be friends with someone who:

• Is too serious and flashes me weird or condescending looks for laughing at something they don't find funny.
• Laughs at everything, like nothing is sacred.
• Thinks I'm being funny and laughs at me when I'm being serious.
• Has a crude sense of humour (racist, sexist etc.).
• Has a sarcastic sense of humour.

A true friend is one who I can laugh with so hard, no sound comes out.

A fellow weirdo is what I need.

Quote of the Day

You're only given a little spark of madness.  You mustn't lose it.
- Robin Williams

Friday Funny

AMAZING, SIMPLE HOME REMEDIES

1.  Avoid cutting yourself when slicing vegetables by getting someone else to hold the vegetables while you chop.

2.  A mouse trap placed on top of your alarm clock will prevent you from rolling over and going back to sleep after you hit the snooze button.

3.  If you have a bad cough, take a large dose of laxatives.  Then you'll be afraid to cough.

Diary of an Incubator: The Battle Plan

Having had postnatal depression with Rory, there is a 50-70% chance I'll get it again with this baby.

But while I'm at higher risk, my doctor has also told me I'm at lower risk as well, because I'll know the warning signs and where to get help.

I've been encouraged by my doctor and various friends to think about what to do in advance.  I need a 'battle plan', a way to fight PND and put boundaries in place to protect myself.  The sad thing is that family and friends are sometimes the ones I need protecting from.  Not ALL of them - but some don't seem to understand.

Here are some things we've put in place to protect me from pressures and expectations as we adjust to being a family of four:

• Have the baby in Albany.  Part of the reasoning for this was that we know less people down there.  Less people = less visitors at the hospital.  When Rory was finally delivered by emergency c-section, I hadn't slept in 24 hours.  Then I couldn't sleep from the adrenaline high from having just had a baby.  Then it was the calling and texting everybody.  Feeds took an hour and a half.  Then I was hooked up to an electronic pump because my milk didn't come in until Day 5.  Even when Rory was asleep, I couldn't rest because I was either (a) like a cow on a milking machine, (b) in discomfort from my c-section, or (c) dealing with staff coming in all the time, banging doors (I know it's their job, I just wished they'd go away).  With visitors on top of that it was all too much.

• Put on my Facebook status that we are very grateful for people's messages of support etc., but ask them please not to call.  The last thing I want to deal with when I'm too sleep-deprived to construct a sentence properly is people calling to have a chat.  They're welcome to email, but it may take me a fair while to get back to them.

• Step down from the ladies' fellowship deacon position at church (this will happen in August) and the secretary position for our tennis club (I did this in April).  Say no to everything else.  You'd think some people would have more sense than to ask a pregnant lady or new mum to start doing more stuff, but some people are a bit thick it seems.

• Not do anything, go anywhere, see anyone unless I want to.  I don't want to sit inside, feeling trapped inside my own house, but nor do I want to be pressured by other people.  I realise now I have Rory to consider, so we'll probably have to go out a bit otherwise he'll go stir crazy.  However, I did get really cross at Duncan for wanting to go visit his relatives after the baby's born.  "Oh, but Auntie So-and-So will want to see the baby."   I don't give a rat's about what Auntie So-and-So wants.  Some people have not made A SCRAP OF EFFORT to visit us on either farm we've lived on and keep expecting us to go to them.  NO WAY!

•  Say no to visitors, unless they're the helpful, encouraging kind.  I don't want anyone staying with us who thinks they're here for a holiday, or is offended by breastfeeding.

• Get outside for some fresh air, even if it's just to sit on the verandah and watch Rory and the dogs play in the garden.

Last week, a whole range of emotions from when Rory was little came flooding back.
What if my mum goes from being the great help she is now to how she was when Rory was born?
What if I end up surrounded by unhelpful people?
What if I can't juggle spending time with both Rory and the baby?

I was panic-stricken, but then I realised that many of these fears are unfounded and God will be there right with me. 

5 Favourite Bruce Springsteen Songs

I love road trips by myself. They don't happen very often, so I really appreciate the time to listen to music I want to listen to (there is only so much of The Wiggles I can stand). I can listen to my Bruce Springsteen Greatest Hits CD without Duncan rolling his eyes at me (I think I was born in the wrong decade).

Here are my five favourites:

1. Brilliant Disguise
2. Dancing in the Dark
3. Streets of Philadelphia
4. Born to Run
5. Hungry Heart

Which are yours?

The Pendulum: Gratitude in all Seasons

I'll admit that grumbling is a sin I've perfected.  Before I became a parent, I thought that parents (particularly mums) whinged about their kids and the trials of parenting far too much.  My Facebook feed was full of it.  For heaven's sake, I thought, just be grateful you have kids at all.  So many people can't.

But now I'm in a different stage of life, I can fully relate.  It's very tempting to use Facebook to have one big whinge.

I hear a lot of childless people telling parents to be grateful for the family they have and the circumstances they find themselves in.  This is true!  I should be more grateful for my little family than I am at times.

But these rebukes have also irked me.  Not just because I was being corrected about my attitude, but because THEIR attitude was also wrong.  I think some single people assume that being married and having children will cure all of their problems.  That they'll no longer experience loneliness.  That they'll be happier and more fulfilled.

I've wanted to say to some single people, "DON'T covet my life."  Not because my life is always terrible, but because what they're seeing is not reality.  They're often seeing what they want to see.  But I haven't said anything because I feared it may sound cruel.

I can see it now in hindsight, that there is also much to be thankful for about singleness - time to spend with other loved ones, time to enjoy a career, more time to yourself, less restrictions when it comes to serving at church....

Some married people with kids need to be told to be thankful, but some single people also need to be told to be thankful and not to covet.