Get On Your Soapbox #1

I've been thinking...and I've decided it's high time I had a rant on this blog...a real rant hehe.

Finals time is fast approaching for the AFL and I think Middo's post pretty much sums up my feelings - excitement and nervousness at the same time.

I've also been told that a lot of my blog seems to be about football so what a perfect topic to rant about.....my least favourite topic.......the Freo Dorkers. How appropriate with the next Western Derby less than 48 hours away.

When I heard they were entering the AFL, I groaned loudly. I was only 11 but I thought straight away that this state was not big enough for two teams. The Eagles were the kings of the AFL at that stage and the Vics were scared. Why ruin everything by dividing the state?

I could go on all day about the insipid Dorkers and their bitter and twisted supporters (I know heaps of Dorkers fans and we have a peaceful rivalry ;)). Here are my main rants in distinct dot point form ;).

• It's quite simple really - Dorkers fans are bitter about their lack of success. That's why they love to rub it in when they win a derby. No I might be anti-Dorkers but I feel really mean about gloating over an Eagles' derby victory. So I don't say anything. But would the Dorkers fans return the favour - oh no, they love to gloat.
• They reckon they're real good cos they've won 6 derbies. Hello? How many have the Eagles won? I think it's 17?
• Many Dorkers fans laughed when the Eagles lost the grand final last year. Well, Dorkers how many times have you made the finals? Once. In eleven years. And you lost. At home. Enough said.
• Booing Chris Judd after he won the Ross Glendinning Medal this year was disgraceful. You won. You should be satisfied. Who cares about the medal?
• It was in a newspaper article last year, that Dorkers' fans don't like Eagles' fans wearing their colours in Freo cos it's THEIR turf. Well, if you want Freo as your territory, fine. But we have the entire west coast as OUR turf, including the rest of Perth. It'll be a bit squashy for you all down in Freo, don't you think? Haha.
• I don't even think of the Dorkers as a true West Australian team. When I think of WA culture, I think of tough blokes and beer and John Deere tractors. I remember watching Eagles games' in the early 90s and during the ad breaks there were ads for Con's Liquor, Vic Bitter and John Deere tractors. The Eagles' blokes back then were tough hard men - Mainwaring, Worsfold, Wilson and co (I'm not getting into arguments about current players and hair gel). The Drokers don't represent WA, just Freo, and they wear PURPLE. Enough said (go the Glory though).
• A lot of Dorkers fans boast that they are the second favourite team of people who support Victorian teams but live in WA. Well, of course you are, Dorkers. The Vics hate the Eagles. We stole their cup twice. We're feared and successful. You're not. They don't see you as a threat.
• Many Dorkers' fans are actually ex Eagles' fans who have been sadly lead astray (including my brother). I can almost understand people changing teams to support a more successful team, but the Dorkers? Delusional!
• Perth news readers are extremely biased towards the Dorkers. They openly display their delight when the Dorkers win a derby. When the Eagles win they're not nearly as excited. It's like Eddie McGuire commentating Collingwood games. I think it's part of Australia's obsession with supporting the underdog. At least support a good underdog.
• I remember the Dorkers thinking they could actually win the first derby in 1995. The Eagles put them in their place and they'll do the same on Sunday.

So now I've had my rant. Do I feel better? Yes. Was it mean to the Dorkers? Yes. But everyne loves a friendly banter. I'm sure there are anti-Eagles sites/blogs out there. I aint gonna shout 'kick 'em in the head' like some little kids were are at the Melbourne v Richmond game I went to last month at the G. Violence solves nothing, people. I want a good, clean match with no brawls or anything. We'll hit 'em hard on the scoreboard and I have three words to say to the Eagles - SHOW NO MERCY!

Do I love Dorkers' supporters? The answer is YES. I may be disgusted at their choice of football team but many of them are still my friends, family and workmates.

I know many people may be cringing and shaking their heads, thinking this is a rant about nothing, what's the big deal about football anyway? Well, only a fan would understand.

Rant over :)

(I got this poster for free in the Sunday Times in 1995. Someone is now selling it on ebay for $500! Some nostalgia for Eagles' fans *sigh*)