Wednesday, October 31, 2007

Lesson 5 from Sarah's School of Dating

This is your favourite series......admit it! ;)

Dr. Sarah from Sarah's School of Dating is back for all of your relationship needs. Today's topic came from a suggestion in the comments section on a previous post in this series. Yes, it's taken me nearly a year to get around to posting on this but better late than never...right?

The biggest issue for me is what "I" do to 'flirt or show an interest often ISN'T meant that way when a girl does it to me...but because its what I do I can't help but think 'are they interested in me?'

So let's talk about flirting.....
  • What do you do when you think someone is flirting/interested in you but you don't return that interest?
  • Is flirting wrong or part of the process of being 'chased' or doing the 'chasing'?

Let's start off with a scenario:
Jade is interested in Mike and being not very subtle about it. In fact, she's so obvious that a lot of her female friends and acquaintances have noticed even though she hasn't exactly told many of them. Meanwhile, Mike is oblivious to what's going on and he thinks Jade is just being friendly. Jade is trying all sorts of things to get Mike's attention including suddenly becoming very interested in golf (a passion of Mike's) and has started organising 'golf days' even though she has never been interested in golf before. In fact, many of Jade's friends are getting a bit cheesed off as they suspect they're only being invited so Jade can call it a 'group activity' and she doesn't care less whether they're there or not.......she just wants to get close to Mike.

As a bystander who has noticed what is going on, what would you do?
a) Nothing, it's none of my business. Let them sort it out.
b) Confront Mike and let him know (politely) that Jade is interested in him and he'd have to be blind not to notice what's going on.

Okay, pretend you're Mike and one of your friends has just chosen option B. After finding out about Jade's interest in you, what would you do next? (We'll presume that Mike does not return Jade's feelings)
a) Confront Jade and let her down gently, saying you're sorry but you just see her as a friend.
b) Confront Jade and tell her you're not impressed at her manipulation of using his favourite activity to get close to him and that you're not interested.
c) Ignore it, stick your head in the sand and hope she gets over it.
d) Flirt madly with her even though you're not interested. It's just a bit of harmless fun, right?

I think it's true to an extent that girls know other girls' sets of tricks (probably because they've used those tricks themselves) and guys can tell who other guys are interested in.

For the first scenario, I'd be tempted to choose A and do nothing but in certain circumstances it might be okay to confront one of the people involved if they are getting themselves into dodgy settings. I've seen the following scenario before and it often ends badly.

Sally is interested in Nick and decides to organise some activities to get closer to him. First she organises 'group activities' of things that he likes (like Jade did). Nick seems completely oblivious and thinks Sally is just being friendly. Then she invites Nick over to dinner at her place when no-one else is home. Nick goes along happily (alarm bells should start sounding right now). Sally continues to organise 1-1 activities between her and Nick, believing that since he is accepting her invitations, he must be interested. Meanwhile Nick has no such feelings for Sally and eventually she finds this out. Then she gets really angry at Nick for not turning down one of her 'dates' earlier and letting her know that he never felt that way. Sally doesn't speak to him again.

So who's wrong - Sally or Nick? Well, although Sally is organising some pretty dodgy 'settings', it really is up to Nick to be honest and not just go along with it because he enjoys the attention. Since he is a bit naive, that's why option B (the quiet word in his ear from a friend) may be helpful. It's not about being cruel and humiliating Sally...but it's far kinder to set her straight early.

Back to Mike and Jade. Say a friend chose option B and mentioned to Mike that Jade is interested in him. Should he ignore it or confront her. Confronting is definitely the scary option. I would probably only do it if their behaviour was really inappropriate e.g. touching etc. But then I reckon we all feel rather uncomfortable approaching someone and asking them if they're interested in us. To me, it feels kind of arrogant.

I think it's important that everyone has their own set of boundaries in regards to places they go with members of the opposite sex. Some guys I know would never have accepted Sally's invitation whether they were interested in her or not, because the setting screams dodginess. You need to work out your own boundaries and stick to them. That way if someone asks you to cross them, you can politely decline.

So is Jade wrong for using Mike's favourite pastime to get close to him? Personally, I think yes although I'm sure some people will disagree. Jade was never interested in golf before she started liking Mike and it's doubtful whether her sudden interest in the sport will continue when she stops liking Mike. Don't get me wrong, it's good to try new things - who know you might start to like them. But I think it's far better to be yourself. I wouldn't be that impressed if someone suddenly became a big Eagles' fan because they were trying to get my attention ;)

Is flirting wrong then or is it just part of the 'dating game'? There's no doubt it can be fun but like in the Sally and Nick scenario, it can turn sour very quickly. Sally eventually expected Nick to express interest in her or 'ask her out'. When he didn't make a move and it turned out he wasn't interested, she became angry at him for going along with her. Sometimes the only kind thing to do is to let someone down gently.

It's wrong to flirt with someone if you're not interested in them. Those of us who have been 'led on' by someone will understand. If we are to love each other, then it's not very loving to lead people on. No-one wants to end up married to a serial flirt who is always in need of attention from the opposite sex.

Even if ARE interested, don't flirt for ages with them before making your move/initiating a relationship.

If you're not sure if someone is flirting with you or not and you're definitely NOT interested in them, don't ignore them or be rude. Just be friendly but set firm boundaries for yourself.

What are your thoughts? Share your experiences (if you're willing - you can be anonymous) If you were the characters in the scenarios, which option would you choose?

Perhaps I should submit this for Dolly ;)

Monday, October 29, 2007

Bad Things Happen in Threes.....Then Came the Good News

I'm not superstitious but I am wondering if there's any truth in the saying 'bad things happen in threes.'

You see, not long after I wrote my last post on Friday, I was struck down with gastro.

It came on all of a sudden but fortunately it was right before I was due to finish work. I didn't end up going to the international student outreach my church runs on Friday and which I usually help with. Instead I went straight to the chemist and was soon at home in bed on a cocktail of drugs including Immodium and Phynergan and was drinking lots of Gastrolyte (that stuff is foul).

I'll spare you all the details as I don't want to gross you out....particularly if you're eating while reading this post ;)

So that capped off a pretty rotten week for me but by Saturday morning I was feeling a lot better and that's when I received some good news.

My friend, Sarah rang me about a different matter and when she found out I was going to be homeless, she quickly offered me a room at her new place. I knew she was going to be moving house in a couple of months but I didn't know she was still looking for another housemate...I thought she'd already got enough people.

I quickly accepted and thanked her and it turns out it is going to be her, myself and another friend of ours, Joanna living in this house. AND they are moving into this new place on the 11th December - a few days before I have to move out of my current place.

I am bit wary of living with two good friends of mine. I'm not sure how it'll go but I felt this was an opportunity brought along by God and I decided to jump. Hopefully we'll all get along great as housemates and are still good friends when I leave in April. Joanna is getting married to Dan, a week after Duncan and I so I do feel a bit sorry for Sarah, living with two brides ;)

Sarah's parents own the house so hopefully the rent won't be hideous. It's a bit further away from work but Joanna studies at the uni I work at so we might be able to carpool a bit.

I am SO relieved but also feeling ashamed and stupid for not trusting God with this. Why can't I just trust him? He doesn't need to prove himself to me, he's God! He has already proved himself trustworthy time after time, in the Bible, in my life, in the lives of others. All I could do was get down on my knees and thank him.

I'm thankful that he is kind and merciful and I'm so glad he sent Jesus. I pray I'll be able to trust him more and I'm grateful that he's teaching me to trust him more by taking away other things I lean on instead of him....even though it's not pleasant at the time.

Friday, October 26, 2007

This Sucks!

I have received two pieces of bad news in the past day or so.

1) I have nowhere to live from mid December until the wedding.
That's four months! My lease expires on the 31st January and the plan was for Aimee and I to move out and go and housesit for some friends of hers who are going to live in London for a year. Since they rent, we'd be taking over their lease for them and Aimee was hopeful another girl she knows might move in with us. That way she wouldn't risk being stuck with all the rent when I got married. Anyway, that girl has decided not to move in and Aimee doesn't want to move into these people's house in case she finds it hard to replace me down the track. So we've said 'no' to housesitting.

This was a real disappointment for both of us. People were asking me about my living arrangements until the wedding and I was happily telling them that I had somewhere to go. Now neither of us have anywhere to live. Aimee is going away to Mauritius for a while so we decided to move out on the 15th December (her date of departure) and go our separate ways. Obviously we'll be breaking the lease and the stupid real estate agent said we have to find someone or keep paying rent there. My dad's a property manager and he said that's THEIR job and only if THEY can't find someone do we keep paying rent there. Sheesh!

I really don't know what I'm going to do! I was looking at possible rentals on the net and there's no way I could afford any of them. $300 a week for a crappy two bedroom shack in a dodgy suburb. Or $135 a week for a ROOM in a house with five students. No thanks! Did the whole student housing thing for three years. Never again!!! I have no furniture (my place is furnished) and not enough money to rent on my own.

My only option seems to be to beg someone to let me stay with them but I feel uncomfortable doing that. And who'd want me for four months! I'm also wary of living with some of my friends because we're very different and I feel it just wouldn't work. Yes, it's only four months but I'm wary of damaging our friendship. I'm hoping that some kind soul will let me stay but I also want our friendship to be intact.

2) My writing day has been taken away for next year
Some of you will know from this post last year that I've been working four days a week this year instead of full time and have been spending Wednesdays at home writing a novel. Well, I forgot I had to reapply to stay part time for next year and so they have made me full time instead. But then one of the managers told me that even if I had remembered, it's almost certain that my application would have been rejected. The library is making everyone full time or 0.5 and they don't like 0.8 people like me because I make their budget more difficult. So the book will have to go on hold after New Year until after the wedding when I resign (yes another piece of news I'll have to blog about).

Right now I'm disappointed and angry. I was so pleased that everything seemed to be falling into place until the wedding and now everything has been turned on its head. I like control, I like plans and I hate being in limbo, not knowing what's going to happen. Part of me is wondering why on earth God is allowing me even more stress after the stress I've already had this year. But God and I often have different agendas - I want peace, comfort and orderly plans that fall into place and he wants me to learn perseverance and patience and all that stuff. I don't think God's out to 'get me' but I'm afraid he wants to teach me something and the only way I can learn it is through difficulties. I'm terribly afraid that he's going to provide accommodation for me with ferals and 'difficult' people in the lead up to the wedding in the process of making me more like Jesus. I know I need to trust him, to trust that he is good and has everything under control but my first reaction is to freak out. My mother-in-law to be has encouraged me to reflect on the life of Joseph in the Bible when things go wrong and we don't understand.

I'm so over renting it's not funny. I feel so unsettled after moving from flat to flat then back to Albany then back to Perth again during my three years in student housing and that's why living in one place with Emma for three years was so good. Renting is far worse when you're single and you have to find people to live with as well as find a place. Some of my single friends are constantly moving house or replacing housemates and find it so tiring. I look at people who live at home til they're married and think that it's not fair! Be grateful if that's you. I can't wait til I'm married!

If you know of anyone who's looking for a housemate or has a cheap-ish furnished granny flat for rent, then please point me in their direction.

Thursday, October 25, 2007

More Engagement Party Photos.....

Ah, Facebook is wonderful for stealing your friends' photos. My friend, Sarah took these...see I'm giving her the credit.







Shane and Sarah













Jane, Corinne, Jordan and Terios















Rohan, Dan and Mick













Kate


















Shane










James, Suzie and Ruby who came up from Busso. James is going to be our MC at the reception. He's an Essendon supporter (should I be worried ;) )
Jordan, Terios and Jen
Shem, Esther and me. Dunno who or what I'm pointing at.
Shem, Es, me and Brent. What's with the weird expressions on our faces?!?

Wednesday, October 24, 2007

Engagement Party!!!

First of all, I am pleased to say that the engagement party was a big success. Thanks to all of those who prayed for fine weather. It was held in Synergy Parkland in Kings Park (secret location revealed hehe).

It was the busiest weekend I've had for a while and I was stuffed at the end of it - still am a bit. My friend and bridesmaid Rianna arrived from Albany on Friday and stayed with me until Tuesday morning. She was a huge help with preparing salads and what not.

Rianna, Duncan, Jamin (his best man) and I were at the shops before they even opened. By the time we left we were up to our necks in rolls, sliced bread and drinks.

I spilled my mocha on my jeans and all over Duncan's car seat on the way home....great start!

The weather looked ominous and I got calls and text messages from worried guests asking if there was a backup plan. I seriously hoped no-one was going to bail on us because of a few drops of rain. If it were hail I could understand but a bit of rain? Seriously! Luckily, a family friend, Cheryl volunteered her house if things got really bad.

The day was fantastic, I had the best time. The rain stopped in time for the party and the sun even came out. It turned out to be really good barbecue day.

Most people showed up but a few who said they were coming didn't end up doing so and we thought that was a bit odd. My bridesmaid Christina ended up getting really sick on her way to the party so she didn't end up making it which was a bit sad. She's okay now though thankfully. Some people who hadn't RSVPed ended up coming along which I was slightly annoyed about (I AM the RSVP Nazi after all) but luckily I was in the best mood, we had plenty of food and I was just glad to see them. They won't get away doing that for the wedding reception though ;) Some of the 'loners' asked if they could bring friends which was fine with us because I wanted them to be comfortable and I had lost track of the number of people by then.

I was pleased to see people mingling as well and not just sticking to the cliques. Some people told me later that they were glad they got to meet my parents and Duncan's parents. Several of the loners seemed to really hit it off as well, which was great and others were welcoming.

That night, after the party, we went dancing at the Ruby Room which I'll blog about later as I have a bit to say about it.

Here is the pictorial evidence from the day.




Ali, Tammy (with Naomi), Rowena and Sarah













Georgia, Sandy, Suzie (and Ruby) and me holding Shem.










Now Esther has Shem back.













Cam and Craig











Jill and Jane
















Helen and Mandy













Rohan, Dave (or Santa as we call him), Jordan and Rina











Rianna, Rhianon, Emma and Peter















Leanne, Brent, James and John












Mel (Craig's mum) and David (my pastor who is going to marry us)














Brad and Hayley (Dunc's boss and his wife)










Dunc's Busselton friends - Noodles, Treva, Rod, Trevor, David and Brooke










Dalwallinu friends - Taylor, Monique, Ian, Nerida, Karen and Greg













Jamin, Duncan and Jodi










Dunc's cousin Matt, his wife Lynette and baby Emily and another cousin, Alsa.







Lily and Victoria, Dunc's Auntie Jen and Uncle Doug and his parents (and my future parents-in-law!)





From left: Dunc's cousin Chloe, her hubby Dean and daughter Chelsea and another cousin Clayton with his wife Elza (see I'm getting good at names!)









Shirley, Jacinta, Shirley, Mrs Copeman and Garth - family friends.










Brad, Shirley, Jacinta and Trent












More family friends, Pam and David with their daughter Kimberly and her kids, Glen and Maygen










Auntie Marion trying to dodge the camera by taking a pic of me














Anna, Linnea and Uncle Merv













My cousin Gab with Estella and Henry (her sister's kids)










My cousin Leah and her son Charlie. She and her husband and kids came all the way down from Exmouth.

















My cousin Rom and Jared (Gab's partner)










Uncle Merv and Linnea



















Our HUGE cake!













About to slice it....Nooooo, the beautiful cake!!!
















Practising for the big day




























I'm a model ;)







Cheesy smiles





Tuesday, October 23, 2007

Diary of a Wedding Planning Machine: My Right Hand Women

Yesterday, I took the day off work and went bridesmaid dress shopping with my four bridesmaids. Since they were all in Perth at the same time, we had to grab the chance to go (will blog about the engagement party and post photos later ;) ).

Choosing the bridal party is a very important part of planning a wedding. These are the people who are going to be beside you on the big day, to support, encourage and help out practically. Therefore, choosing people who are considerate, available, helpful, organised and unselfish is essential in my opinion.

I've heard some horror stories about bridesmaid-zillas who have tried to steal the attention away from the bride and groom and make the wedding all about THEM. These shallow creatures have complained about the dress, been unavailable to help and some have pulled out at the last minute without giving an explanation.

When Emma was making plans for her wedding, I didn't want to make things even more stressful for her than they already were. This included not complaining about my bridesmaid's dress. I loved my dress, Emma has good taste and even if she chose something that wasn't great, it's not my right to whinge. Bridesmaid dresses can always be sold later.

I think it's also important to realise that the bridal party are responsible for organising the hens and bucks nights and you need to be able to trust them. Neither Duncan or I wanted anyone who was going to do stuff to us that was downright inappropriate (ie. strippers). There's fun and then there's stuff that's just wrong. The bride and groom should have a good time and not be miserable and humiliated. Someone I know (who's a Christian) mentioned once that he had a non Christian friend as his best man and this guy hired a stripper for the bucks night. The groom to be ended up walking out of his own bucks party so as to not dishonour God or his future wife.

Luckily, my girls aren't like that...obviously, that's why I chose them. They are all friends from high school - Rhianon, Emma (who I used to live with and was a bridesmaid for), Christina and Rianna. They aren't my oldest friends but the ones I have remained closest with for a long period of time. I have fond memories of high school days with these girls and they played a pretty big part in introducing me to Christ. Also, the fact that they are friends with each other and will have no problem planning stuff together is an added bonus.

Duncan is having four groomsmen as well - Jamin (a friend of his he knows from camps), Clayton (his bro), Simon (his cousin) and Craig (a mate of ours from church). Well before we got engaged, we were talking about bridal parties and it turned out we both wanted four attendants and had it planned for a long time. Funny how things work out.

Four is the maximum number of bridemaids I would have. Otherwise it's just too hard getting them all together at one time. Some of my single friends say they want eight or more bridesmaids if they get married...crazy! And we decided against flowergirls etc because neither of us have nieces or nephews and it gets too hard with kids as well. I don't want some little kid having a tantrum in the middle of the ceremony! My mum had my cousin as her flowergirl. She was four at the time (she's 38 now!) and she had a tantrum, although luckily it wasn't just before she was to go down the aisle!

Some people have their pets involved in the ceremony and I've been asked if I was going to have Ebony there. Not likely...I can't imagine her doing as she's told ;)

I don't think brides or grooms should feel pressure to have anyone in the bridal party who they don't really want. There are stupid traditions that involve the groom having the bride's brother as a groomsmen or the bride having the groom's sister as a bridesmaid. Duncan doesn't have a sister and, even if he did, I wouldn't have her unless we were really close. Likewise he's only met Tim a couple of times. You should have who YOU want in the bridal party. Some brides bow to pressure and include friends who get in a mood with them for not including them originally.

So yesterday we went to the city on a dress hunting mission and have narrowed it down to a few options which will probably have to be ordered in from over east. I'm waiting to hear back about prices, sizes and designs. Finding dresses to suit everyone is a challenge when different body shapes and tastes in clothes come into it but hopefully we can find something that everyone is happy with.

Some brides have a very clear view about what they want their bridesmaids to wear...I'm not one of them. I find it difficult to design clothes in my head so I decided to just go along and see what was in the shops. My main criteria was that the dresses weren't really revealing with high splits and cleavage hanging out everywhere. I just wanted them to feel comfortable.

Now, it's over to you. What would you look for when choosing a bridal party? If you're married, tell me about your experiences. Were your bridal party a hindrance or a help? (you can remain anonymous if you're afraid they might somehow find and read this....)

Friday, October 19, 2007

Please Petition Heaven....

...for fine weather tomorrow.

We have approximately 150 people coming to our engagement party, it's being held in a park and we have no backup plan - too hard to find anywhere to go nearby with that number of people.

I just checked the Bureau of Meteorology website and the forecast for tomorrow is a 'few showers' with a maximum of 20 degrees.

Please pray for the rain to come later in the afternoon when the party is over. Duncan and I were talking last night and we agreed that it's out of our hands and if it rains we might as well make light of the situation....by encouraging everyone to dance in it :)

The Excellent Adventurers Return

Sarah and Craig, good friends of Duncan and myself, have recently returned from their five and a half month trip overseas (nice for SOME people hehe ;) ). Check out photos from Central America and Morocco on their blog Scoob and Ted's Excellent Adventure.

Now they (and other recently returned travelling friends) can enjoy our engagement party with us. Duncan and I are really glad they're back; we've missed them!

Wednesday, October 17, 2007

Ben Behaving Badly

I thought I would post about this, even though I'd originally planned other posts for this week.

I like Middo's post on the subject. It is far more thoughtful and mature than the many blogs and forum comments that have already touched on this.

I really think Ben should be sacked. The Eagles need to stand by their word and do what they said they would if he screwed up again. He's broken the conditions they set for him and needs to face the consequences. Although if he ends up doing time inside, then they have no choice.

However, as a loyal Eagles' fan, it all makes me very very sad. Sad to see a young guy self destruct like that. His career had such a bright start and now it looks like it will have a very bad end. He might have wealth and fame but these things do not necessarily bring happiness. Ben was smiling when he was arrested. Perhaps this shows he has hit rockbottom and doesn't care anymore?

I don't think people should make excuses for Ben like he was upset by Chris Mainwaring's death or that it was due to the media hounding him. If an ordinary person had been arrested for drug possession, a lot of people wouldn't make excuses for them. Celebrities shouldn't get special treatment even though we know they do.

I wonder what the deal is with the other two chicks in Ben's car (media originally said it was one) and the other chick....Daniel Chick? Who was the person with him who was in possession of drugs.

Although the media aren't to blame for Ben's downfall, anything to do with footy stars (particularly Eagles) is bound to be sensationalised in Perth. Simply because they are our biggest celebrities. We don't have actors based over here like Sydney and Melbourne, all we have are sports' stars and newsreaders. We don't get to hear as much about Vic teams' problem players....not to the extent we hear about Ben Cousins. Even when Adelaide players' John Meesen (now traded to Melbourne) and Andrew McIntyre posted handdrawn pornographic images on Facebook, it got a tiny mention in the Sunday Times. Perhaps it was splashed all over Adelaide newspapers....I don't know, I obviously don't live in Adelaide.

After reading lots of blogs and forum comments about Ben, I was amazed at the amount of stupid people there are in Australia, particularly Perth. People who condemn Cousins yet blindly support and excuse Farmer, Tarrant, Didak, Fevola and any other bad boys that happen to be in their team. Grow up! A lot of these comments came from people who obviously have the maturity of five-year-olds.

People who are laughing and gloating over Cousins' downfall obviously need more help than Ben himself. Ben will hopefully face the consequences of his actions and get the help he needs. But it is a sad sad situation and there are dimwitted fans out there who go around asking Eagles' fans what they think of the situation with nasty smiles on their faces. They should get a life as well. Yesterday a friend who is an Eagles fan told me she'd been heckled by a Carlton supporter at her work. Stupid people! I didn't go around hassling Geelong fans when the stuff about Gary Ablett and the woman in the motel room came out. It was tragic. He was a great player.

I think some people forget that people in the limelight still have families and friends. Ben's family will no doubt be very upset. I doubt these stupid fans would laugh if this happened to a member of their family.

I hope Ben is later able to build a life away from the bright lights of the AFL, free from drugs.

The best comment I read yesterday on a forum came from a guy who pointed out that Ben Cousins needs 'divine help.' Not just self-control to beat drugs but to bring lasting change to his life. And he's not the only one. If the Bible is true when it says that 'there is no-one righteous, not even one' (Romans 3:9) and that we are 'dead in our trangressions and sins' (Ephesians 2:1) then everyone needs divine help - druggies or not.
*Photo is from bigpond.com

Monday, October 15, 2007

Diary of a Wedding Planning Machine: The Art of Mingling

Our engagement party is looming...it's this Saturday!

Apart from the usual stresses that come with organising a gathering (food, drinks, tables, RSVPs, weather)...I'm also worried about the socialising side of the party. Not about me socialising with our guests but rather how they will socialise with each other.

You see, with any gathering, you are going to have certain 'cliques' of people - family, school friends, work friends, church friends etc. And that's fine. They are going to come along and enjoy catching up with the rest of the people in their particular clique as well as catching up with us. In fact, they probably won't hold it against us if we don't get to talk to them that much during the party because a) we see a lot of them regularly anyway and b) they'll be happy just socialising with their clique.

But then there are a few people coming who don't know anyone, except Duncan or I. Some of my friends only know me, they haven't met Duncan yet and certainly don't know any of my family or other friends. These people include a couple of my uni friends (who don't really know each other), a couple from student housing (who are married to each other) and my housemate, Aimee.

I don't want them to be uncomfortable and end up leaving early because they don't know anyone and nobody else bothers to talk to them. I know how I feel at parties where I only know the host and I'm too shy to go and introduce myself because everyone else knows each other and are having a great old time. I usually go just so I can make the host happy by making an 'appearance' and count down the minutes until I can leave.

I don't want people to feel like that at my party. Sure, I'll introduce them to my friends but I can't MAKE them talk to each other. I've had a word to a few of my friends, asking them if they wouldn't mind including the 'loners' and making them feel welcome. As much as I want to, I won't be able to spend the entire party looking after the lonely people because I do want to at least greet everyone and will be flittering around, looking after the food etc.

Now I want to hear from you. Do you have any advice/experiences you can share on how to get people to 'mingle'? I'm not trying to make everyone 'meet someone new' but I do want everyone to feel comfortable. I realise all I can do is introduce people and that some people are just painfully shy and will find it difficult to strike up conversations with strangers.

How do you go at parties when you don't know anyone except the host? Are you shy or outgoing when it comes to meeting new people?

I'm feeling at the moment that my priorities are people who don't know anyone, people I haven't seen for a long time or aren't from Perth and people I haven't met yet (ie. some of Dunc's family and friends) so I can at least introduce myself. That's not to say, that I don't care about my other guests and I want to talk to them....but I know they'll be happy anyway.

Would you prioritise some of your guests over others?

Thursday, October 11, 2007

The Albany Engagement Party

Last Saturday night, my mum threw Duncan and I an 'Albany' engagement party - that is, she invited Albany people that wouldn't be coming to the Perth party. I had grown up knowing these people and haven't seen a lot of them for a while....it was great seeing them all again. Her birthday was also on the 3rd so it was like a combined birthday party as well.

The people who came were old workmates of my parents, old neighbours and just other random people we knew from around the place, Dunc's cousin and his family, plus some of our friends who either live or were holidaying in Albany. And of course my dear old Nan (although she wisely hid from the cameras...sneaky old nana!)

I forgot to take pictures at the beginning so by the time I remembered to get out my camera, some of our guests had left. Here's some of the action.






Tim (my bro), Ken, Sue, Mum and Ruth














Robert (Emma's dad) seeing what's on the box













Duncan, Mick, Corinne and Rianna (who's hiding at the back)












Me and Rianna












Doesn't Duncan look chuffed to have such a great woman?....haha










Corinne and Mick, friends from church who were holidaying in Albs the same time as us. They got married in July.











Matilde, Joan and Jan














Glory and Helen (Emma's mum)










Nola, Ros and Kevin















Wally, Harry, Carol and David







Then Mum decided it was time to crank her new Elvis CD and have a dance. I must get my love of dancing (or bopping along to music, really) from her.









First she danced alone













Then with her friend Ruth who was down from Perth













Then with Nola












With both of them













And with a group












John didn't feel like dancing







While I was busy taking photos, Mum said to me, "Where's Duncan? I want to dance with him."
I told her, "Mum, Duncan's not into dancing."
But she insisted, "Go and get him, I want to dance with him."
Duncan was watching the Wallabies game (most of our guests had gone at this stage). I told him, "My mum wants to dance with you."
Duncan just chuckled to himself.

Big mistake refusing a dance with the future mother-in-law. Within seconds she was in the loungeroom, saying in a shrill voice, "DUNCAN! Come and dance with me." Then she clapped her hands at him the way she does to the cats when she wants to put them outside.

Duncan still refused. But she won't let him get away with it at the wedding though.









So she danced with Dad instead. His pants nearly fell down.
















Aah, Dad just can't do a normal face in any photo. He always wants to look like Mr Bean.

















John putting Dad's glasses on the back of his head












Then they all got into it.














David and Carol

















Wally (he used to be my tennis coach)

























Dancing photos are definitely the funniest :)