Three Years...It Cannot Be

Since I said goodbye to thee.

My Nan's memorial plaque at the cemetery in Albany
(her ashes were scattered)

The great grandson she never got to meet

How I remember her

If she'd been alive, she and Rory would be getting ready to celebrate their 101st and 1st birthdays respectively on the 19th January.

Shopping Ethically

Image is from here

Duncan and I watched a documentary on SBS about the clothing industry in Bangladesh last year.  Appalling working conditions resulted in buildings collapsing, killing and maiming many people.  Those who were left amputees could no longer work and had to be financially supported by their families.  Their pay rate was disgraceful.  What really hit home was that I shop at the clothing chains responsible for all of this.  Greed!  It's such a blind spot for all of us.


After that, I couldn't buy any clothes made in Bangladesh with a clear conscience.  Now some Christians would argue that boycotting is not a solution, that if we don't buy the products then the people will be out of work, resulting in them being poorer still.   I was glad to see that Oxfam has released a list of the clothing companies that have signed the Bangladesh Worker Safety Accord.  There is a petition here to sign if you're interested.

But this only addresses the building safety and does nothing for fair wages and workers' rights.  I wish I could shop at some of my favourite stores now that they're on the 'nice' list, but, the truth is, they still fail in many other areas.

Shop Ethical is an online consumer guide (they also have a booklet and a smart phone app available) which details and rates each company behind popular brands according to their environmental and social impact.  And some of them fail big time - oh my!  Definitely a big conscience prick there!  They are evaluated independently (so not by any company seeking to badmouth their rivals or blow their own trumpet) - see the FAQs for how it works.  It's NOT about persuading people to buy the more expensive brands instead of cheaper ones - some of the classier brands receive a bad rap as well.  Nor is it about product quality - the product itself could be excellent, but the company who makes it exploits their workers in developing countries, tests on animals, and uses poor environmental practices.

Now I've taken the hard step of trying to shop ethically when it comes to food and clothes.  It's not easy!  Some 'good' brands are not available in small country towns.  Some of my favourites don't get a good rap. I love a bargain as much as anyone.  It's very tempting to pretend I never saw that documentary, that I never visited the Shop Ethical website or bought the app.

But I can't.  If I claim I love Jesus, then I must love my neighbour.  Not turn a blind eye because I want to shop how I want.  Not continue on my merry way because it inconveniences me, a rich, white Westerner.  Not support companies which exploit people made in God's image for profit.

This is one of my hopes for 2014 and beyond.  We each can make a difference.


This post has been entered in the January edition of the Christian Blog Carnival.  If you're a Christian blogger and would like to enter one of your recent posts, submit it here today.

The Bubba: 9-10 Months

The bubba is on the move!  He started commando crawling at 9.5 months and, although he can crawl on all fours, he much prefers slithering.  He should be in the army!

The house has been somewhat rearranged and bubba-proofed.  Now he's started pulling himself up.  Oh my!

He had his first trip to the pool (and just loved the water), and two delightful visits from interstate friends.

I'm really enjoying this stage.  He crawls around and entertains himself.  I can even get a few things done - it's fabulous!

 

 

 

Future best friends perhaps?  Ebony says, "NOT!"

Where's Rory?

There he is!

Poor tired fellow.

 

 

Someone loves his swing - an early Christmas present
from Nanna and Pop.

Yes, peekaboo is his favourite game.  He loves
curtains and all kinds of cloths (we call him
'The Man of the Cloth').

 

Cuddles for Nanna

 

Wrestling with Daddy

 

 

With his friend Marcus who was visiting from NSW

 

 

Attempting a family photo after church (Rory was
very grumpy)

Ahhh a sleeping bubba, finally

 

Having a great time feeding himself broccoli,
cauliflower and carrot for lunch

 

 

 

A prison for bubbas.

 

 

With his friend Ruth from Sydney.  "It's not that funny, Ruth.
Really!" says Rory.

Getting a Christmas present from Santa.

 

 

Everybody's Free (To Wear Sunscreen) by Quindon Tarver

Hands up who remembers this song?  Well, it's more dialogue set to music, really.  I was in Year 9 when it was included in the Triple J Hottest 100.  Man, that seems like yonks ago now.

I don't agree with everything in this song, so I've just included the lyrics that I do like.  Some great advice to start the new year.

Ladies and gentleman of the class of 1997, wear sunscreen.
If I could only offer you one tip for the future, sunscreen would be it.
The long term benefits of sunscreen have been proved by scientists,
Whereas the rest of my advice has no basis more reliable,
Than my own meandering experience, I will dispense this advice now.

Enjoy the power and beauty of your youth, oh never mind,
You will never understand the power and beauty of your youth,
Until they've faded,
But trust me, in twenty years,
You will look back at photos of yourself,
And recall in a way you can't grasp now,
How much possibility lay before you,
And how fabulous you really looked.
You are not as fat as you imagine.

Don't worry about the future,
Know that worrying is as effective
As trying to solve an algebra equation
By chewing bubblegum.

Do one thing every day that scares you.
Sing
Don't be reckless with other people's hearts.
Don't put up with people who are reckless with yours.
Floss
Don't waste your time on jealousy.
Sometimes you're ahead, sometimes you're behind.
The race is long and, in the end, it's only with yourself.

Remember compliments you receive, forget the insults.
If you succeed in doing this, tell me how.
Keep your old love letters, throw away your old bank statements.
Stretch

Get plenty of calcium.
Be kind to your knees, you'll miss them when they're gone.

Enjoy your body, use it every way you can.
Don't be afraid of it, or what other people think of it.
It's the greatest instrument you'll ever own.
Dance, even if you have nowhere to do it but your own living room.
Read the directions even if you don't follow them.
Do not read beauty magazines, they will only make you feel ugly.

Get to know your parents, you never know when they'll be gone for good.
Be nice to your siblings, they are your best link to your past,
And the people most likely to stick with you in the future.
Understand that friends come and go,
But a precious few who should hold on.
Work hard to bridge the gaps in geography and lifestyle.
For as the older you get, the more you need the people
You knew when you were young.

Accept certain inalienable truths.
Prices will rise, politicians will philander, you too will get old,
And when you do, you'll fantasise that when you were young,
Prices were reasonable, politicians were noble,
And children respected their elders.

Respect your elders.
Don't mess too much with your hair,
Or by the time that you're forty,
It will look eighty five.
Be careful whose advice you buy,
But be patient with those who supply it.

But trust me on the sunscreen.

Lyrics sourced from here.

5 Hopes For 2014

It is with both excitement and trepidation that I announce my hopes for this year and put them firmly in God's hands.

1.  Get fit.  A friend of mine is the local Zumba instructor.  I've always swore I'd never do Zumba.  I'm the most unco-ordinated person on the planet, and anything that involves dancing, I look like I have too many legs all tripping over each other.  But I've decided to eat my words and give it a go.  There's no other high impact aerobic exercise available locally, and I like to exercise with others as it gives me the motivation to give it my all.  Netball is out of the question because there is no team at my level and it hurts my back.  So, there....I'm go to be Zumba-ing it up on Monday nights this year.  Duncan has promised to be home from work in time to look after Rory.

2.  Read the Bible regularly.  Whether I can be a part of a Bible study or not, I need to really feast on God's Word.  I'm not interested in set plans, so I'm going to continue on with the devotional I'm doing, read a Psalm a day, and keep up with the verses and discussion we receive from our pastor via an iphone app.

3.  Finish editing my book!  Surely this has got to be the year!

4.  Shop ethically.  Recently, I've been evaluating how my faith in Christ impacts my grocery and clothes shopping.  Expect a post on this very soon.

5.  Take Rory to playgroup.  I've been putting off trying the local playgroup because friends of mine told me they found it very cliquey.  Now I've decided that I should give it a go and make up my own mind about people instead of listening to hearsay.  A former workmate told me she is planning to go with her new baby so at least I'll know someone.  It's hard at the moment because it's on from 9:30-11:30 and that clashes with Rory's morning sleep.  When he drops to one sleep a day, then we'll go.

2013 Hopes: How I Went

It's that time of the year again.  I've blinked and it's New Year's Eve and I'm sitting at my computer wondering what hit me this year.  It has been the worst year of my life!

How did I go with my hopes for 2013?

1.  SURVIVE.  My aim is to get home from hospital and be in 'survival mode' (like I am when I'm sick or recovering from being sick - just do the bare essentials).  A shower is an achievement.  Preparing a meal is an achievement.  This will be hard for me.  I like to DO things other than day-to-day tasks, but I also know my limitations.  I'm aiming just to rest, recover, enjoy getting to know the baby, and being a family of three.
I failed!  Although by God's grace, I am sitting here typing this post today, I should have known I would never have been happy with just surviving.  Yet, I have survived!  There were many moments during August where I decided to take my own life.  Now I am feeling much better, and although I want to be with Jesus, I also want to live for Him right now, in the present, on this earth.

Should we have another child, there are so many things I would do differently.  I would refuse visitors for a start.  It was all too much.

2.  Continue editing my book and then search for a literary agent.  I'm doing some editing at the moment, I will stop (obviously) when baby is born, then try to do little bits here and there when I'm feeling a bit more robust.
I didn't do any editing until October and I only managed a few chapters.  My main aim this year was to get well and keep Rory alive.  The moments of spare time I did have I spent doing much more pleasant things than editing.  When you've had broken sleep for months, it's not a good time to be carefully reading your own work.

3.  Join our church's women's Bible study group or meet one-to-one with another Christian woman.  Again, this can wait until things have settled down a bit.
Just when I felt ready to get back into Bible study, my church's morning ladies Bible study shut down because of a lack of numbers.  I started my own small group with two other ladies from the farm, but that ended up falling in a heap unfortunately.  Rory's terrible sleeping meant it was impossible for me to rejoin the night Bible study Duncan and I had been a part of before Rory was born.  Duncan would go on Wednesday nights and I would stay home, only joining in if it was at our house.  Next year I feel more confident that we could put Rory down in a portacot at someone else's house and he would actually sleep so hopefully I can get back into some sort of Bible study again.

4.  Go on a holiday to Sydney to celebrate my 30th birthday instead of having a party.  My birthday is in May, but if we do go, it won't be until July or August.  Duncan thinks an interstate trip with a baby will be hard for us.  We'll see.
Well, we did this one!  We braved a plane trip with a baby, visited some dear friends in Sydney, and I got to add to my wonderful Sydney memories.  I even managed a party a few weeks before our trip....bonus!

5.  Keep on with the mission convenors role at our church in partnership with Duncan.  Last year I hoped to get the congregation (including myself) to take more of an interest in missions.  This year I want to actively encourage the missionaries we support through emails, letters etc.
Duncan and I stepped down from this when Rory was four weeks old as it was clear I had postnatal depression.  We've just been voted in to do the role again as of now.

Good riddance 2013!  You gave me my beautiful boy!  You showed me what a great man I have.  You surrounded me with some lovely friends.  You gave me new friends in women who were fighting the same battles.  You showed me that I have a great God.  Yet, I am so glad to see the back of you.  No, a change of year won't make everything different but, to me, it feels like a fresh start.

We've All Had That Friend...

Imagine if you had a friend who you only heard from when they wanted something from you.

When things were going well for them they never bothered to talk to you.  But when a disaster happened they were begging you to help them.

If you didn't give them what they wanted, they grew angry at you, shook their fist at you and told you to get lost.  They didn't want to hear the hard truth about the dodgy decisions they were making.  They thought it was perfectly ok to interact with you at special occasions but ignore you for the rest of the year.

Even though they don't bother with you most of the time, they still think they have the right to invite themselves into your house.  It doesn't matter to them that it's your house and you alone have the right to decide who enters it.  Not only that, they think that they and all of their friends have the right to come over because they're good people and of course you must want them in your house.

You love this friend and desperately want a good relationship with them, but you never seem to get much of their attention.  You know you're the best friend they'd ever have, but you're always competing with their many other 'friends' who you know aren't good for them and will only lead them astray.

Have you had a 'friend' like this?  I know I've felt used by some people who just want to waltz into my life whenever they see fit.  I've felt outraged at their expectations.  I mean, how DARE they!

While we may have been treated badly by that friend....we also ARE that friend.

That's how all of us treat God.

We come crying to Him when there's a natural disaster or when we or a loved one are ill, but when He doesn't answer our prayers the way we want Him to, we tell everyone what a bad God He is for not doing what we want.  He forget all of the times He's loved and cared for us, and we take all of His blessings without a word of thanks.  We talk to Him at Christmas or Easter but ignore Him for the rest of the year.  Despite heaven being His domain, we think we have the right to make the rules about who enters and who doesn't.  Of course, we and our friends are in 'cos we're 'good people'.

Yet, despite all of this, God loves us and pursues us.  He gave up everything for us.  But He is a jealous God who won't compete with the idols in our hearts and lives forever.

Something I'm pondering as the new year approaches....