Together

I haven't read many Christian books this year...in fact, I've hardly read any.

But I did read and enjoy this one.

Together is Carrie Ward's story of how she sat and read the ENTIRE Bible to her three (later four) children at the breakfast table over several years.  After struggling with her own Bible reading and feeling disillusioned and hypocritical about how she was going to instil a love of Scripture in her kids, she prayed and then optimistically started the reading adventure from Genesis to Revelation.  I received this book as a Christmas present from a friend last year and what a timely gift it was now that I'm a mum and can relate to Carrie's struggles.

Here's what I learnt from this great little book:

It's never too late and they're never too young:  I've been tempted to think that since Rory is a baby it's pointless to read the Bible to him.  It's never too early.  I'd like the reading of Scripture together to become 'normal' for him - maybe not at the breakfast table, but sometime (a friend of mine reads the Bible with her kids at lunchtime before they have their afternoon naps).  If you've never read the Bible with your kids, it's not too late no matter how old they are.  When Carrie started reading to her kids she had three (her fourth child arrived part way through their read through) and her eldest was four.

Persist, even though it seems like they're not listening: Carrie despaired after Day 1 because her kids were...well...being kids.  She wondered what the point of it all was...until she saw them role playing what they'd just read about in Genesis.  They were listening after all!

Read ahead of them: Carrie would 'prepare' for the next reading by staying a chapter or two ahead of her kids.  That way she could pray about and decide how to tackle issues raised in the passage and potential questions they might ask (she also has a great section in the book on how to deal with and explain those awkward, adult-content type passages in an age-appropriate way).  It also motivated her to read the Bible on her own and not just when her kids were present.

The wagon may stop momentarily but don't get off it: When Carrie was estimating how long it would take to read through the entire Bible she factored in things such as sick days, visitors, when she was having her fourth child....life sometimes gets in the way of carefully made plans.  But that's not a reason to stop.  Don't despair if you've missed a few days, just get back on the wagon again.

Nothing beats the real thing: Children's Bibles have their place, but nothing is better than the real Bible, the inspired Word of God.  I think often many people assume children won't understand the real Bible, but God is powerful.

Sometimes I read a Psalm to Rory as I read through them myself.  Reviewing this book was a reminder to get back on the wagon again.

The Older Woman and the Younger Woman

Dear Older Women,

I'm watching you.  Not in a creepy stalker type way, but I'm watching you to learn how to be a godly woman.

Therefore, when I hear you unfairly criticising young mothers behind their backs, I feel dismayed and discouraged.  I wonder what you're saying behind my back about how I parent Rory.  I'm not sure if I can take you at face value.  I don't know if I can approach you or be honest about the parenting decisions I've made.

When you say that you don't know why young mothers are so stressed, it's not that bad etc., I feel like there is no listening, wise ear I can turn to.  It seems like you've forgotten that you were that young mum 10, 20 or 30+ years ago and I don't know where to seek encouragement and empathy from.

When I see you drinking too much, getting 'tipsy', I start to feel like I'm alone in striving to swim against our alcohol-saturated and infatuated culture.  I start to wonder what the point of being different is when the church is no different to the world.

When you have the 'my views of the Bible are correct and you're young and don't know anything' attitude, I feel like we can't study the Word together and have a friendly discussion, learn from each other, and even disagree.

You see, I don't have a Christian mum.  I learn from the myriad of Christian women I've met in my life. 

'Older woman' doesn't mean old.  It's all relative.  By older, I just mean older than me.

I had a scary thought recently; I'm so used to being the younger woman and 'watching' the older women.  But now I wonder....who's watching me?

To some, I'm the older woman.  The primary school girls, the tweens, the teens, and the twenty-somethings.  Maybe they're also sussing out what it means to be a woman who loves Jesus and follows Him wholeheartedly.  Maybe they're watching to see how I relate to others, behave when I think no-one's watching, speak about others, react when people treat me badly and life doesn't go my way, how I treat my husband, my son, the lowly, forgotten people in society....

That's scary, but it's also a privilege.

I just have to share a great conversation I had with a lady from my church recently.  She is in her early eighties and she and her husband have recently celebrated their 60th wedding anniversary.  When I congratulated her, she asked me how long Duncan and I have been married.
"Five years," I replied.
"You're just at the beginning," she told me.  "Have you ever thought about walking out?"
Thoughts raced through my mind.  The honest answer was 'yes', so I didn't want to lie. I think if all women are honest, they'll admit to having had those thoughts.  Marriage is wonderful, but it's also hard work!   But if I told the truth, would she just give me a lecture?
"Yes."
"Me too," she said.  "So many times."  Then she encouraged me to stick at it.
I came away feeling so refreshed by her honesty and looking forward to (God-willing) celebrating more marriage milestones with Duncan.

Thank you to those women who have mentored, encouraged, prayed for and with me over the years, who have read the Bible with me, and been up for a chat.  You're the kind of woman I want to be.  Your example is noted. 

Bible Verse of the Day

Likewise, teach the older women to be reverent in the way they live, not to be slanderers or addicted to much wine, but to teach what is good. Then they can urge the younger women to love their husbands and children, to be self-controlled and pure, to be busy at home, to be kind, and to subject to their husbands, so that no-one will malign the word of God.

Titus 2:3-5

Friday Funny

Another one that was emailed to me.  I have no idea how much of it's true, but it gave me a laugh.  I reckon it was written by a man haha.


AMAZING FACTS

If you yelled for eight years, seven hours and six minutes you would have produced enough sound energy to heat one cup of coffee.
Hardly seems worth it.

If you farted consistently for six years and nine months enough gas is produced to create the energy of an atomic bomb.
Now that's more like it.

The human heart creates enough pressure when it pumps out to the body to squirt blood 30 feet.
Oh my gosh!

A pig's orgasm lasts 30 minutes.
OH MY GOSH!

A cockroach will live nine days without its head before it starves to death.
Creepy!  I'm still not over the pig.

Banging your head against a wall uses 150 calories an hour.
Don't try this at home; maybe at work.

The male praying mantis cannot copulate while its head is attached to its body.  The female initiates sex by ripping the male's head off.
Honey, I'm home.  What the heck?

The flea can jump 350 times its body length.  It's like a human jumping the length of a football field.
30 minutes!  Lucky pig!  Can you imagine?

The catfish has over 27,000 taste buds.
What could be so tasty on the bottom of a pond?

Some lions mate over 50 times a day.
I still can't believe that pig....quality over quantity.

Butterflies taste with their feet.
Something I've always wanted to know.

Right-handed people live, on average, nine years longer than left-handed people.
If you're ambidextrous, do you split the difference?

Elephants are the only animals that cannot jump.
Ok, so that would be a good thing.

A cat's urine glows under a black light.
I wonder how much the government paid to figure that out.

An ostrich's eye is bigger than its brain.
I know some people like that.

Starfish have no brains.
I know some people like that, too.

Polar bears are left-handed.
If they switch they'll live a lot longer.

Humans and dolphins are the only species that have sex for pleasure.
What about that pig?

Aria's 1st Birthday

About a year ago we were privileged to be asked to be godparents to our friends Joel and Sam's newborn daughter Aria. 

Last month she celebrated her first birthday.

Rory was very excited to be able to celebrate
with his little friend.



 



It's very cool to be a godparent.  We hope to be able to encourage her to follow the Lord Jesus in the years to come, be a godly example, and have a lot of fun along the way.

I will be perusing Meredith's series Hooray for Godparents - Part 1, Part 2 and Part 3.

Loose Lips Sink Friendships

I was once asked what I consider to be the most important traits to look for in a friend.  I have a few, but one is an absolute must:

TRUST

Without trust, there cannot be an intimate friendship.  Sure, you can be friends with someone you don't trust, but they can never be a close friend.  If our conversation is not progressing past casual chit-chat/what the weather is like because I'm afraid they might blab anything I say to the next 50 people they encounter, then it's not really a friendship; they're more of an acquaintance.

Women have all gossiped or had other women gossip about others to us - I think it's pretty safe to say that.  I did a dictionary search for the word 'gossip' as it seems to mean different things to different people.  Some say a gossip is someone who maliciously spreads lies and rumours.  Others say it's someone who can't keep a secret because they get too excited or just can't help themselves, but no harm was actually intended.  Still others say if someone repeats something they were asked to keep to themselves, whether it's true or not, good news or bad, it's still gossip!

The Free Dictionary seems to support all three definitions:

A person who habitually spreads intimate or private rumours or facts.
A conversation involving malicious chatter or rumours about other people.
Can't keep a secret.
Idle talk.

I've told gossipy people stuff, knowing that they were going to spread it as soon as possible.  That was because I really didn't care!  They may have thought they had a tasty morsel of news, but either it was old hat or nothing really confidential or important.  I remember laying a trap for a gossip once; I told them something that wasn't really that secret, but asked them to keep it to themselves.  When I realised that their lips had flapped, I knew I couldn't trust them with anything really important.  It doesn't matter whether they're just one of those people who 'got too excited and couldn't help it'.  They need to SEW their lips shut if need be.

I deliberately hid that I was in the MBU from some people.  It's not because I was ashamed but because I didn't want them delighting in telling people.  I didn't want the whole 'gossip disguised as prayer points' thing happening:
"We should pray for Sarah."
"Oh, what's happened to Sarah?"
"Didn't you know?"
It made me happy to stop them getting their jollies out of telling people.

Information shared should not automatically be classified as gossip.  It's ok to share news.  We should definitely pray together for people.  The problem is when it is BREAKING CONFIDENTIALITY.

What's so juicy about gossip?  Why do it?  Why do some people particularly get a buzz out of it?

I think it's the 'being in the know' factor.

Gossip gives people a sense of self-importance.  They knew FIRST.  Therefore, they must have more friends, be more liked and in the inner circle and not the outer.  This is quite interesting because gossips rarely stay in the 'inner circle' when people realise they can't be trusted.  Have you ever been told a piece of gossip and seen the deflated look on the gossip's face when you told them you already knew?  Suddenly they realise they're not so special.  They're not everyone's best friend.

It is so, so hard not to indulge in gossip.  Whether it's been in schools, workplaces, churches, I've seen and heard it all.  It's horrible to feel on the outer, to not be accepted by the clique.  But gossip is never a good way to make friends.  If someone is bitching to you about their best friend, then what are they saying about you to someone else?  Gossip may unite women at first, but it's usually only temporary.

One thing that struck me about the definitions of gossip was that it was described as 'idle talk'.  One of the biggest temptations for women to gossip is when we're idle.  I've noticed that in country towns.  I used to work in a shop where sometimes the same women would come in several times a day, admitting it was because they were bored.  Oh my, the stuff they would say about people in the town, people I hadn't even met yet!  Keeping busy can help with the temptation to gossip.

Please God, help me and other women keep a reign on our tongues.  Let us speak words of truth, encouragement and love.

Bible Verse of the Day

A gossip betrays a confidence, but a trustworthy person keeps a secret.
Proverbs 11:13