Friday Funny

Things are good at the moment (praise God!). There's lots to look forward to - I have a week of leave next week and Duncan's coming down tomorrow. I'm happy :D

To lift all your spirits for the weekend, here's a joke.

PERFECT WOMAN, PERFECT MAN

Once upon a time, a perfect man and a perfect woman met. After a perfect courtship, they had a perfect wedding. Their life together was, of course, perfect.

One snowy, stormy Christmas Eve, this perfect couple was driving their perfect car along a winding road, when they noticed someone at the side of the road in distress. Being the perfect couple they stopped to help. There stood Santa Claus with a huge bundle of toys. Not wanting to disappoint any children on the eve of Christmas, the perfect couple loaded Santa and his toys into their vehicle. Soon they were driving along delivering the toys. Unfortunately, the driving conditions deteriorated and the perfect couple and Santa Claus had an accident. Only one of them survived the accident.

Question: Who was the survivor? (Scroll down for the answer. Trust me, it's worth it)



























Answer: The perfect woman survived. She's the only one who really existed in the first place. Everyone knows there is no Santa Claus and there is no such thing as a perfect man.

**** Women stop reading here; that is the end of the joke.
**** Men keep scrolling down.






























So, if there is no perfect man and no Santa Claus, the woman must have been driving. This explains why there was a car accident!
****Men only- Keep scrolling down!























By the way, if you're a woman and you're still reading, this illustrates another point - women never listen!!!!!

Bible Verse of the Day

Are you a Christian? Have you ever looked out at the world and thought, "Hey, they've got it all." The rich are getting richer. The poor are getting poorer. Evil is prospering and there's no justice. Why bother sticking with God? There's heaps of people out there who couldn't give two hoots about God and they seem to be doing just fine.

If you're Christian and you've ever felt like that, then be encouraged by God's own word.

Better is one day in your courts than a thousand elsewhere; I would rather be a doorkeeper in the house of my God than dwell in the tents of the wicked. Psalm 84:10

God is good :)

You Are 61% Burned Out

You are very burned out. You need a huge break from your responsibilities, starting as soon as possible. And you need this time to reevaluate what you really want out of your life. Because you're working hard and going no where... and that would burn anyone out!

Are You Burned Out?

Do you use Blogthings?

If you do, then you might be able to help me.

Yes, I need technical help....again!!!

If you don't know what Blogthings are go http://www.blogthings.com

I tried to copy the code of one onto my blog but it kept coming up with an error message saying that the opening and closing tags don't match or some rubbish.

I've put them on my blog before and have never got an error message before now.

Help! :)

More on the Benny Saga

Today I woke up to my clock radio as usual and this morning they were having a poll.

Should Ben Cousins be given another chance?

I think it was about 85% (or thereabouts) that were all for him playing for the Eagles again once his suspension is over. I think I'm part of that 85%.

Once the Eagles board decide to welcome him back to the nest, I really hope he emerges as a better player and person. Michael Gardiner was welcomed back after his exile, then stupidly got drunk and crashed his car and I really hope Cousins doesn't follow in his footsteps. It's disappointing and sad to see such a great player go down the path he has. Hopefully once he gets his act together, people will again remember him as the player who virtually carried the Eagles in 2001 during one of their worst ever seasons - and not for the headlines he's been creating in the last couple of years.

The Eagles' reputation as a club has been taking such a battering. It'd be nice if everyone could look at this banner that's at so many Eagles' home games and nod their heads - 'WCE You Make Us Proud'.

Benny, What Have You Done?!?

He has been an idiot, that's what he's done.....and what he is!!!

If you haven't heard the 'breaking news' that is being flashed all over the internet, Ben Cousins - former Eagles captain, alleged coke snorter, gangster-associate and booze bus escapee has been suspended indefintely for missing training. I applaud the Eagles board for this decision.

Yes, I must admit, when I first heard the news, I wondered how well the Eagles are going to do without him? But that's totally the wrong attitude to take. Champion or no champion, he's broken the rules and must face the consequences. AFL footballers are not gods. I rejoiced when Michael Gardiner was given the flick (what fools St Kilda are for giving him another chance).

The Eagles have copped their fair share of bad publicity over the last few weeks and while it's true they have their problem players, what team doesn't? They're the only club with enough balls to do something about it. Last year, when a couple of Collywobbles when on an all night bender and got into a fight with fellow losers, coach Mick Malthouse said he would not suspend them if it meant Collingwood could lose a game. I say get rid of idiots...that's the only way they'll learn.

I'm still a very one-eyed Eagles fan and we're still gonna go back-to-back this year, with or without Cousins. I hope all of the other teams are shaking in their boots.

And to any Dorkers fans having a good old laugh now, my advice is to stop, deflate your big head and stop kidding yourself that none of your players are getting up to mischief.

When the Dorkers have got rid of Jeff 'I can't control my temper and I've got issues' Farmer and Heath 'I get into fights at the Perth Cup' Black, then maybe you can laugh.

Sarah, the fired-up one.

The Last Stitch

I'm sure you'll all be so interested to know this.....the last stitch in my mouth from having my wisdom teeth out came out this morning. Hooray!

If you're thinking that's totally gross, that's fine....but to me it's a tremendous relief. I was a bit worried because I thought the sockets weren't healing properly and there was one stitch that wouldn't come out on the bottom left side. I was very tempted to pull it out but since it obviously wasn't ready, that decision could have been a painful and a bloody one.

Last Friday, it was one month since I had my teeth out and finally I'm stitch free. Now I just need to get all the feeling back in my tongue and the bottom of my mouth which I've been told can take a couple of months (in rare cases never...but we won't talk about that!) The other thing that bothers me know is that near the socket where the last stitch was, I can feel something pointy sticking up under my gum. I'm not sure if it's a tooth, a bone or something else but it's not on the right side as well. Eeek! I hope it's nothing bad.

Too Much Busyness is Bad for your Health (and Mine!!)

Have you missed me lately? If not, why not? *grin*. The title of this post may indicate why I haven't been blogging as frequently as I would like.

I try to blog about every three days. That gives my readers (and there are so many of them) *cough* time to check my latest post and comment if they wish. But now the busyness is slowly threatening to choke my blogging career.

I blogged about this topic last year (if you missed it, where were you? - you can read my post here) and now it's happening to my life AGAIN. In fact, I was reading Bek's blog about trying to stop her life getting cluttered with 'stuff' and out of control and I thought, 'yep that's me.'

I had to sit down and soberly evaluate what I can realistically get involved in and what I need to give a miss. I'm constantly battling with the temptation to take on new 'hobbies' and then I end up stressed and tired with no time for people. My housemate has the Boundaries book and I've flicked through it but never read it from beginning to end. Perhaps I should? Is that how you feel sometimes? You say 'yes yes yes' to everything people ask of you and then end up burnt out, stressed, disillusioned and angry. I'm not a chronic 'yes' person but sometimes when I say 'no' to someone, I'm left with a sense of guilt afterwards.

These last few weeks I've been extra busy at work, adjusting to all sorts of changes in my life and trying to maintain relationships with people. I need more sleep than most people in order to function properly - about 8.5-9 hours, otherwise I get cranky and dependent on caffeine. I don't know how some people can go to bed at 2am then get up at 7am and go to work! That's not normal!!

So I sat down and started to 'prune' stuff from my life. That sounds harsh but I believe it's necessary. I think because Christians in particular are frequently told we need to serve more that it leaves people burnt out and guilt-ridden. It should not be this way. We're all human and have our limits. I would rather focus on a couple of things and be committed to them and do them well than have lots of things and give a half-baked effort at each. One of the worst things about taking on too much stuff, is that you start to resent and regret the stuff you are involved in, the passion dies because you're so tired and it becomes just another 'thing' to do, rather than something you used to enjoy.

I was in danger of having something on every weeknight which leaves me too tired at work. Currently my weeknights look like this:

Monday - nothing but I call my nan in Albany once a week on this night.
Tuesday - Singing lesson then bible study (we all co-lead this group)
Wednesday - I meet 1-1 with a friend from church to read the Bible, pray and discuss what's happening in our lives. This is especially important to my friend as she can't make it to church every week. Sometimes I stay for dinner afterwards and sometimes this night is free.
Thursday - nothing
Friday - Easy English Bible Club. I (and others) meet with Chinese students who are investigating Christianity.

As you can see, sometimes three nights a week are taken up with church stuff which is good but it means I really need those other nights to relax, get some time alone and sometimes to catch up with other friends or family who aren't Christian. If I had something on every night of the week and had no time for them, how am I going to reach out to them and love them? It wouldn't be a very good witness.

Recently I was tempted to add even more activities to my schedule. I used to play tennis on Monday nights and Wednesday nights but have to decided to give it up for this semester at least due to lack of time and just go to the gym instead. Also, my singing teacher asked me if I was interested in joining a Christian a cappella choir that was looking for sopranos. I was shocked as there was no way I thought I'd be good enough and it sounded really cool but I just can't offer the kind of commitment they're looking for. It'd involve rehearsals on one night of the week as well as weekend performances, which means I wouldn't get to see Duncan as much :( So I said no. I've also dropped one TV show from my viewing schedule ;)

There you have it. Hopefully now I'll have less 'stuff' and more time for people and just staying sane. Don't get me wrong, there's lots of worthwhile things to get involved in and quite often these activities are people-oriented anyway - but I just can't do them all and neither can anyone.

We have to choose.

Oh yes, if you're a Christian and a soprano and would like to join an a cappella group, then leave a comment and I can put you in touch with them. You don't have to be a professional singer, just able to hold a tune.

The Grumbling Israelite

Have you ever had 'one of those days'? Not when anything major goes wrong but just a lot of little things which makes you whinge and complain like there's no tomorrow. Yes? I reckon a lot of you are nodding in agreement.

For me, last Thursday was 'one of those days'. I didn't wake up on the wrong side of the bed if that's what you were wondering (my bed is up against a wall so I can only get out one side). However I was pretty tired from being undisciplined with sleep rations during the week and when a workmate told me I looked like I had bags under my eyes, that started my descent into a 'mood'.

I quickly looked at myself in the mirror and my eyeliner had smudged which caused me to look like I had shadows under my eyes. But even after I fixed that up I still looked pretty whacked! Then I received the news that the lecturer whom I was going to be teaching a class for later that afternoon, had decided to change the content at the last minute! Boy, was I annoyed! I'm the type of person who likes to be organised, prepared and 'in control'. I didn't want to rock up at the class and just wing it. So I was panicking that I had to change the script and handouts extremely quickly and probably didn't check them thoroughly.

My grumbling increased no end. I grumbled that the library was packed full of students and was noisy and I felt like shouting, "GET OUT!". I grumbled that there were people wandering all over the place in a daze and I had to push through them quickly, going "Excuse me.....EXCUSE ME!". I grumbled that I was becoming increasingly absent-minded (and I can't blame it on old age or pregnancy!).

• I was so tired I decided I needed a Coke, put my money in the vending machine but pressed the wrong number and ended up with Coke Zero when I wanted the real thing!
• I stuck my bankcard in the photocopier instead of my photocopying card.
• The photocopiers kept producing poor quality photocopies because the glass was scratched and dirty.

I was fed up and just didn't feel like dealing with people. When it was my turn to do a shift on the Reference Desk, I was joined by a workmate who was having a foul day like me. In fact, her day was worse because her car had broken down on her way to work and she had gotten a lot of abuse from people for holding up a lane of traffic (she responded with the one finger salute). I was delighted to talk to someone who was also in a crabby mood (happy people are the worst people to be around when you're irritable) and we whinged and complained and grumbled and then whinged some more.

I can't stand it when I'm in a bad mood and I get patronised by people. I've seen lots of people do it to each other. They know someone's in a bad mood and want to be left alone but they deliberately go up to them and tease them then wonder why they get snapped at. I'm not suggesting it's right to have angry outbursts and bite people's heads off but those people KNOW that they're being provocative and they just want to see the other person lose their temper. DO NOT do this! If you see someone in a less than pleasant mood and keeping to themselves, then leave them alone. They're probably staying away from people so they can get over whatever it is that's bugging them and NOT snap at others. Think about how you'd feel if someone did that to you.

If you're Christian (or even if you're not) have you ever read Exodus and thought 'gee the Israelites are an ungrateful lot'? After all God had done for them, how on earth could they grumble so much. Now I know I'm no different. God has given me so much yet I was focusing on the negatives and any excuse to grumble would do. Grumbling is serious, yet I constantly fail to respond with thanksgiving even to difficult situations - some which don't look so bad after a while.

So there's my rant for the week. After that day was over I did feel pretty silly about being moody. Thank God that Duncan and I are now in Albany this weekend for my brother's 21st. I'll blog about it when I get back!

Cornerstone

I just had a top weekend at Cornerstone which was held at Fairbridge Farm in Pinjarra. The only downside - poor university employees , like myself, have to work the public holiday so I missed out on the last day of the camp :(

If you haven't heard of Cornerstone before, it's a Christian camp for 18-39 year olds. There's usually a couple of hundred people there from a range of denominations and backgrounds. In previous years it was stacked full of bible teaching, which was good, but sometimes it was information overload. So this year, there were less talks and more recreational activities and time just to hang out which was better.

There's always a guest speaker and a guest musician. This year the speaker was Simon Manchester, a pastor from Sydney. When I saw his name on the brochure, I was sure it sounded familiar and then I remembered where I'd heard his name before. I own a book called Forgiving Hitler which is about a Jewish refugee who arrives in Australia after World War 2 and settles in Sydney. Her daughter makes some Christian friends at school and starts attending church, later giving her life to Christ and soon Kathy follows. Simon Manchester is mentioned as the Sunday School teacher that taught Kathy's daughter in the 1970s. I'm absolutely sure it's the same person! How random is it that I remembered that yet I constantly forget where I put my keys?

The talks were on Ezekiel which is a book that only gets opened in my bible when the wind blows the pages there if I'm outside! But Simon explained it really well and now I'm keen to read more of the Old Testament. The guest musician was Richard Beeston and his band who were also from Sydney and, man, did I love their music!! In my spare time, I played tennis, swam in the pool and did a jive dancing lesson which was interesting as I have two left feet when it comes to organised dance.

Overall it was a top weekend and I'm very glad I went. This year was my third time at Cornerstone and I'm slowly starting to get over my fear/dislike of camps. I still dislike large camps in general because sometimes it gets really clicky and you don't meet anyone new. I'm not the sort of person who can come along to a big gathering not knowing anyone and just waltz up and introduce myself therefore I think smaller groups are better as far as building relationships go. But Cornerstone was great because I got to meet new people and also catch up with others I hadn't seen for a while.

Visit the website if you want more info and consider coming next year!

My Girls

In December, I introduced you all to my great (late) bantam hen, Lily. Now I'd like to introduce you to two more of the loves of my life. They make me go all warm and fuzzy inside. Awwww I'm such a sap!

The one on the left is Ellie and Marmalade (or Marmers as she's usually called) is on the right. Aren't they just gorgeous? Okay, I know I'm biased and everyone probably thinks their animal is the most beautiful (unless it's a really manky animal, I suppose). This was taken on a cold winter's night when they were lying by the fire back in 1998.

My girls first came to live with us back on the 12th January 1997 when they were five years old. Yep, on 12th January this year, my girls had been part of my family for ten years and they're now fifteen! They're sisters and previously lived as farm cats at Manypeaks (40kms from Albany). Then their owners decided to move and subsequently give them away. I don't know who could part with such gorgeous animals but their loss was my gain.

In December 1996, I was reading the local paper when I saw them advertised - 'Free to a good home. Two ginger female sterilised cats.' At first I was a bit sceptical whether they were actually girls because most ginger cats are male. My kitten Sassy had been hit by a car just a couple of months earlier and I really wanted another cat. My mum eventually agreed (Dad doesn't count since he dislikes most animals). We were the only people who rang up about them and after going out to the farm to meet them, I was smitten. So they became ours and if we hadn't adopted them, they might have ended up at the pound and possibly on death row! Not a nice thought!

While I loved my girls, they were very different to Sassy. I'd had Sassy since she was six weeks old and she loved cuddles and affection. Ellie and Marmers had recieved very little attention and had lived outside and were therefore not nearly as used to being smothered by people. They enjoyed being stroked but if you tried to pick them up or sit them in your lap, they would wriggle until you let them go.

I also realised that despite being sisters, they had very different personalities. Marmers was outgoing, loved attention and people and obviously was popular among the tom cats because she'd already had three litters of kittens before being sterilised. Ellie was timid and shy but affectionate once she got to know you - it just took a while to build up her trust. She on the other hand had had no kittens. Ellie had a beautiful meow - it sounded just like she was singing! Marmers' meow sounded like she was a lamb bleating. If they were human, Ellie would be a prude and Marmers a slut.

Getting the girls into town was a bit of a challenge. They travelled in separate boxes, taped up with masking tape but Ellie was so frightened she tried to claw her way out of the box. When we eventually got them home, we were too afraid to let them outside and litter boxes seemed foreign to them so eventually, after hanging on for several days, Ellie crapped behind the TV!

Sibling rivalry gradually began to develop. After being starved of attention for five years, suddenly they had people fawning all over them. Outgoing Marmers lapped this up so we had to be careful to make sure Ellie got enough attention too. This made Marmers very jealous and it became more common for the girls to hiss and swipe at each other. They both became increasingly fat, particularly Ellie, although I don't know why since we don't overfeed them. She has since lost some weight but has some loose hanging skin as a result and she looks like she needs a tummy tuck.

Over the years, Ellie in particular has proved to be an expert hunter and would rather eat a stinky old bird or mouse than the nice meat we buy them. Both the girls were made to wear large bells on their collars as punishment. I made it quite clear that I didn't approve of Ellie's new hobby and if she caught something she got a little smack on her rump and sprayed with the hose. Then she'd go and sulk. Marmers was far too lazy to hunt and quite content to eat whatever Ellie would leave her. I do remember once Marmers caught a wild rabbit - but it was blind!

Now the girls are much too old to be hunting and sadly Marmers is looking quite thin and her fur quite mattered. She may also have arthritis in her hind legs. Ellie looks remarkably good for her age. I think Marmers might also be losing it a bit upstairs unfortunately. I caught her peeing on the concrete driveway a year or so ago.

I hope my little tigers go on for a few more years yet :) Here are some more photos so you can see Marmers in her heyday.

Ellie (front) and Marmers in 1997.

Ellie, 1997.

Marmers, 1997.

Ellie, 1997.

Ellie, 1997. Don't take a picture of me!

Marmers, 1998.

Ellie still doesn't want her picture taken - 1998.

Ellie (left) and Marmers - April 2004.

Mum with Ellie - January 2005.