Ben Behaving Badly

I thought I would post about this, even though I'd originally planned other posts for this week.

I like Middo's post on the subject. It is far more thoughtful and mature than the many blogs and forum comments that have already touched on this.

I really think Ben should be sacked. The Eagles need to stand by their word and do what they said they would if he screwed up again. He's broken the conditions they set for him and needs to face the consequences. Although if he ends up doing time inside, then they have no choice.

However, as a loyal Eagles' fan, it all makes me very very sad. Sad to see a young guy self destruct like that. His career had such a bright start and now it looks like it will have a very bad end. He might have wealth and fame but these things do not necessarily bring happiness. Ben was smiling when he was arrested. Perhaps this shows he has hit rockbottom and doesn't care anymore?

I don't think people should make excuses for Ben like he was upset by Chris Mainwaring's death or that it was due to the media hounding him. If an ordinary person had been arrested for drug possession, a lot of people wouldn't make excuses for them. Celebrities shouldn't get special treatment even though we know they do.

I wonder what the deal is with the other two chicks in Ben's car (media originally said it was one) and the other chick....Daniel Chick? Who was the person with him who was in possession of drugs.

Although the media aren't to blame for Ben's downfall, anything to do with footy stars (particularly Eagles) is bound to be sensationalised in Perth. Simply because they are our biggest celebrities. We don't have actors based over here like Sydney and Melbourne, all we have are sports' stars and newsreaders. We don't get to hear as much about Vic teams' problem players....not to the extent we hear about Ben Cousins. Even when Adelaide players' John Meesen (now traded to Melbourne) and Andrew McIntyre posted handdrawn pornographic images on Facebook, it got a tiny mention in the Sunday Times. Perhaps it was splashed all over Adelaide newspapers....I don't know, I obviously don't live in Adelaide.

After reading lots of blogs and forum comments about Ben, I was amazed at the amount of stupid people there are in Australia, particularly Perth. People who condemn Cousins yet blindly support and excuse Farmer, Tarrant, Didak, Fevola and any other bad boys that happen to be in their team. Grow up! A lot of these comments came from people who obviously have the maturity of five-year-olds.

People who are laughing and gloating over Cousins' downfall obviously need more help than Ben himself. Ben will hopefully face the consequences of his actions and get the help he needs. But it is a sad sad situation and there are dimwitted fans out there who go around asking Eagles' fans what they think of the situation with nasty smiles on their faces. They should get a life as well. Yesterday a friend who is an Eagles fan told me she'd been heckled by a Carlton supporter at her work. Stupid people! I didn't go around hassling Geelong fans when the stuff about Gary Ablett and the woman in the motel room came out. It was tragic. He was a great player.

I think some people forget that people in the limelight still have families and friends. Ben's family will no doubt be very upset. I doubt these stupid fans would laugh if this happened to a member of their family.

I hope Ben is later able to build a life away from the bright lights of the AFL, free from drugs.

The best comment I read yesterday on a forum came from a guy who pointed out that Ben Cousins needs 'divine help.' Not just self-control to beat drugs but to bring lasting change to his life. And he's not the only one. If the Bible is true when it says that 'there is no-one righteous, not even one' (Romans 3:9) and that we are 'dead in our trangressions and sins' (Ephesians 2:1) then everyone needs divine help - druggies or not.

*Photo is from bigpond.com

Diary of a Wedding Planning Machine: The Art of Mingling

Our engagement party is looming...it's this Saturday!

Apart from the usual stresses that come with organising a gathering (food, drinks, tables, RSVPs, weather)...I'm also worried about the socialising side of the party. Not about me socialising with our guests but rather how they will socialise with each other.

You see, with any gathering, you are going to have certain 'cliques' of people - family, school friends, work friends, church friends etc. And that's fine. They are going to come along and enjoy catching up with the rest of the people in their particular clique as well as catching up with us. In fact, they probably won't hold it against us if we don't get to talk to them that much during the party because a) we see a lot of them regularly anyway and b) they'll be happy just socialising with their clique.

But then there are a few people coming who don't know anyone, except Duncan or I. Some of my friends only know me, they haven't met Duncan yet and certainly don't know any of my family or other friends. These people include a couple of my uni friends (who don't really know each other), a couple from student housing (who are married to each other) and my housemate, Aimee.

I don't want them to be uncomfortable and end up leaving early because they don't know anyone and nobody else bothers to talk to them. I know how I feel at parties where I only know the host and I'm too shy to go and introduce myself because everyone else knows each other and are having a great old time. I usually go just so I can make the host happy by making an 'appearance' and count down the minutes until I can leave.

I don't want people to feel like that at my party. Sure, I'll introduce them to my friends but I can't MAKE them talk to each other. I've had a word to a few of my friends, asking them if they wouldn't mind including the 'loners' and making them feel welcome. As much as I want to, I won't be able to spend the entire party looking after the lonely people because I do want to at least greet everyone and will be flittering around, looking after the food etc.

Now I want to hear from you. Do you have any advice/experiences you can share on how to get people to 'mingle'? I'm not trying to make everyone 'meet someone new' but I do want everyone to feel comfortable. I realise all I can do is introduce people and that some people are just painfully shy and will find it difficult to strike up conversations with strangers.

How do you go at parties when you don't know anyone except the host? Are you shy or outgoing when it comes to meeting new people?

I'm feeling at the moment that my priorities are people who don't know anyone, people I haven't seen for a long time or aren't from Perth and people I haven't met yet (ie. some of Dunc's family and friends) so I can at least introduce myself. That's not to say, that I don't care about my other guests and I want to talk to them....but I know they'll be happy anyway.

Would you prioritise some of your guests over others?

The Albany Engagement Party

Last Saturday night, my mum threw Duncan and I an 'Albany' engagement party - that is, she invited Albany people that wouldn't be coming to the Perth party. I had grown up knowing these people and haven't seen a lot of them for a while....it was great seeing them all again. Her birthday was also on the 3rd so it was like a combined birthday party as well.

The people who came were old workmates of my parents, old neighbours and just other random people we knew from around the place, Dunc's cousin and his family, plus some of our friends who either live or were holidaying in Albany. And of course my dear old Nan (although she wisely hid from the cameras...sneaky old nana!)

I forgot to take pictures at the beginning so by the time I remembered to get out my camera, some of our guests had left. Here's some of the action.

Tim (my bro), Ken, Sue, Mum and Ruth

Robert (Emma's dad) seeing what's on the box

Duncan, Mick, Corinne and Rianna (who's hiding at the back)

Me and Rianna

Doesn't Duncan look chuffed to have such a great woman?....haha

Corinne and Mick, friends from church who were holidaying in Albs the same time as us. They got married in July.

Matilde, Joan and Jan

Glory and Helen (Emma's mum)

Nola, Ros and Kevin

Wally, Harry, Carol and David

Then Mum decided it was time to crank her new Elvis CD and have a dance. I must get my love of dancing (or bopping along to music, really) from her.

First she danced alone

Then with her friend Ruth who was down from Perth

Then with Nola

With both of them

And with a group

John didn't feel like dancing

While I was busy taking photos, Mum said to me, "Where's Duncan? I want to dance with him."

I told her, "Mum, Duncan's not into dancing."

But she insisted, "Go and get him, I want to dance with him."

Duncan was watching the Wallabies game (most of our guests had gone at this stage). I told him, "My mum wants to dance with you."

Duncan just chuckled to himself.

Big mistake refusing a dance with the future mother-in-law. Within seconds she was in the loungeroom, saying in a shrill voice, "DUNCAN! Come and dance with me." Then she clapped her hands at him the way she does to the cats when she wants to put them outside.

Duncan still refused. But she won't let him get away with it at the wedding though.

So she danced with Dad instead. His pants nearly fell down.

Aah, Dad just can't do a normal face in any photo. He always wants to look like Mr Bean.

John putting Dad's glasses on the back of his head

Then they all got into it.

David and Carol

Wally (he used to be my tennis coach)

Dancing photos are definitely the funniest :)

Reunited With My Girl

Last week, I put Ebony in the boarding kennels for the first time since I got her while Duncan and I spent some time in Albany. I wasn't sure if she'd like me very much when she got home....but she did.

She was so glad to see me evidenced by the "Purr, purr, meow *Mum I've missed you*, purr, purr, meow *Don't ever go away and leave me in that place again*, purr, purr, meow, meow *Pat me, Mum*."

Getting a pat from her mum.

Playing with her feathery thing

I missed her while we were away and I kept saying to Duncan, "Do you think Ebony will be missing me and thinking I've given her away."

He replied. "She'll be fine. She's a cat."

I wasn't feeling quite so fond of her the next morning when she woke me up at 5:30 by meowing at the top of her voice outside my bedroom door.

Get on Your Soapbox #6

I won't have to think about this until next March probably but it annoys me all the same.

People who go to the football but aren't at all interested in football. Instead they just go to get drunk or to be 'seen'. You know, like the people who appear in the social pages of the newspaper, laughing in a fake way.

The last few times I've been to the footy (both in Perth and Melbourne) there were people there who were paying absolutely no attention to the game whatsoever. Teenage girls all dressed up, spending the whole time sending text messages. Or people who were just too blind drunk to see anything.

What's the point of wasting your money buying a ticket if you're not even going to watch the game? If these people want to get drunk so badly they should go and do it somewhere else instead of buying a ticket when someone who really really wants to go is being deprived of one.

I know of some people who score free tickets to AFL games through friends or family who are members or sometimes through work if their workplace sponsors the Eagles or Dockers. And the only thing they get excited about is getting sloshed off their faces in the corporate box.

If I had a spare ticket to give away, I would give it to someone I knew was a big fan and wouldn't have a chance to go otherwise.

Diary of a Wedding Planning Machine: Loaves and Fishes

You may be thinking: what's with the weird title? This post is actually about our engagement party.

We've been engaged for nearly three months but have been too busy/slack to get around to organising one. I think I've mentioned before that Duncan has a HUGE extended family. They're very close and keep in touch with great aunts, third cousins etc whereas I wouldn't have a clue who those people are in my family. So we're inviting EVERYONE to our engagement party and I think we'll need a miracle with loaves and fishes to be able to feed all these people.

Because neither of us have a house large enough to cater for the multitudes, we've decided an outdoor picnic is a goer (location will remain a mystery until after the date due to the public nature of this blog) :). Then afterwards I've convinced Duncan to go out and have a dance with any of our guests who are willing ;).

Much of my life lately has revolved around stamps, envelopes and address books, ringing Duncan to find out his family's names and addresses. I made the invitations on my computer and printed a huge batch but it wasn't enough so my printer's been cranking recently. I think we've invited about 200 people! Good grief, I wonder if people at our picnic location will think we're weird!

So far we've had 30-something people RSVP to say they're coming and a few can't come but the deadline is a week away so they've still got time. If you've read this post I did last year, you will know how I feel about people who don't RSVP.

I'm both excited and nervous about the party at the same time. It's not just about the organisation of the food but I feel quite overwhelmed by crowds when I'm one of the reasons for the party. It's different if it's a rock concert or something but the thought of all these people rocking up partly because of me, I'm just like "aaaagh!" Despite the fact that people might think I'm loud and 'out there' and that I've done acting, my problems with stress and the thought of trying to talk to everyone is a bit daunting.

But I'm sure God is in control and everything will be fine!

Holidays and Mainy

Things have been a bit quiet at the Sedshed for the past few days. The reason being is that I'm on holidays in Albany this week (yes...again! I took two chunks of annual leave quite close together), this time with Duncan though. Ahhh holidays are good.

Still in shock about the death of Chris Mainwaring though. There's a post about it over at the Backyard Missionary blog so I won't say much about it here. Only that while he was a celebrity doesn't mean God loved him more than any of the world's poor - but we feel we 'know' him because he was constantly on our TV screens. Sometimes we even feel 'connections' with fictional characters in TV shows. Look at the outpouring of grief when Maggie Doyle died on Blue Heelers. Apparently more than two years after that episode, viewers still rang Channel 7 asking if she was really dead!

Sad news about Mainy! And sad news about people I don't know dying all around the world.....often for their faith in Christ.





Photo is from http://blogs.yahoo.com.au