Forgiving Hitler

I don't know what goes through one's mind when they see a title like this.  Can anyone forgive Hitler?

Carrying on with the topic of forgiveness, I thought I would review this book as well.  I first read it eight or nine years ago during a women's book club which used to exist at my old church in Perth.  It's one of those stories that really sticks with you because it is someone's personal story.  Written by Kel Richards, this is the story of Kathy Diosy, a Jewish woman who lived in Budapest, Hungary prior to and during World War 2.  After her life was destroyed by the Nazis and her father died in a concentration camp, she makes her way to Australia with her mother.  After her teenage daughter was invited to church by a friend, Kathy is confronted with the gospel.  She later puts her faith in Jesus Christ and makes peace with her past after her anger had long burned against the Nazis.

It is a pretty riveting and powerful story.  It's not a complete biography - it mainly focuses on her experiences during the war and life in Australia.  Although the parts during the war are pretty gripping reading, I personally would have liked to have had more focus placed on her conversion and life as a Christian.

One of the ladies in the book club remarked that she wasn't sure whether Kathy really had forgiven Hitler.  I think that's something between Kathy and God, and not something anyone else can comment on.  After reading Unpacking Forgiveness, I'm not sure whether Forgiving Hitler is the right title for this book (but I don't have any other suggestions either).  I don't know if any person can offer Hitler forgiveness since he is dead (and was likely unrepentant).  I know what Kathy means...she has come to terms with the gross injustices done to her and others, and has left it in God's hands.  I'm just not sure about the title.

One of the best things about this book is that it is someone's personal experience of evil which should shake us all up a bit about the reality of living in this world.  Many of us have been untouched by such injustice and could never understand what Kathy has gone through.  It is a stark reminder that issues such as injustice and forgiveness are not a walk in the park, and should not be just glossed over or swept under the carpet.  This book names and identifies evil for what it is.

But the greatest thing about this book is that it points us all back to our need for a Saviour.  No matter who we are or what we've done (or how 'good' we think we are), all of us have fallen short of God's standard.  We have sinned against God and against each other.  We all deserve judgement.  We all need God's forgiveness.

The back of the book says, It's a journey to discover who needs to forgive whom.

This book is available from the Matthias Media Australian store here.

There is also a US store here.

Unpacking Forgiveness

This is a book I read a while ago now, and have been meaning to review every since.  After watching Revenge, I felt now would be an appropriate time.

Unpacking Forgiveness by Chris Brauns is one of the most brilliant, thought-provoking, challenging and helpful books I have read during my 10 years as a Christian.  It is a book I recommend every Christian should read, although it will no doubt anger some.

For a long time I've been concerned with how some Christians define and view forgiveness.  It has been a topic I've been wrestling with for five years, and although I have a lot ot learn on the issue, I feel very uncomfortable with how forgiveness is being modelled among Christians.  Here's what I have observed:

An emphasis on telling hurt people, "You need to forgive," but an unwillingness to tell a perpetrator, "You need to repent."

The idea of forgiveness as something internal...like a feeling.   I hear a lot of people say, "Oh Bob hurt me, but then I just forgave him in my heart."

A lack of people willing to help those who have been hurt do the Matthew 18 thing.  It's hard enough to confront someone who hurt you without hearing fellow Christians say, "I'm not getting involved.  I don't want to take sides."

An emphasis on curing bitterness as the main purpose of forgiveness.

Finally, a Christian book that addresses these issues properly!

Brauns is very concerned about the rise of what he calls 'therapeutic forgiveness' in the church.  In Chapter 4: More Than A Feeling he criticises a book called Forgive and Forget: Healing the Hurts We Don't Deserve which was written by Lewis Smedes in the eighties.  This book describes forgiveness as ceasing to feel anger or resentment over an offense or perceived offence.  Brauns believes 'forgiveness without repentance' cheapens forgiveness, misunderstands God's forgiveness, and refuses to identify and name evil.

Brauns attempts to really unpack what forgiveness is...and what it's not.  He defines forgiveness as:
A commitment by the offended to pardon graciously the repentant from moral liability and to be reconciled to that person, although not all consequences are necessarily eliminated. (page 56)
He addresses a question I have (and probably many others have): Do I need to forgive someone who is unrepentant?  He starts with looking at God's forgiveness offered in Jesus. 

God's forgiveness is conditional.  Only those who repent and believe are saved.
So God offers the present of forgiveness to all people.  Does this mean that all people are forgiven?
The answer to that question is emphatically no.  Like any present, the gift of forgiveness must be opened.  We receive the gift of forgiveness by turning in faith to Christ. (page 51)

We need to start with God's forgiveness of us so we know how to forgive others.  Brauns argues that we forgive as God forgave us.  How should Christians do this?  We should start by having a disposition of grace towards those who offend us (page 55).  But God does not forgive the unrepentant as this would go against His justice and holiness.  We should have a 'spirit of forgiveness' and actively try and repair the relationship, but Brauns insists all efforts should be made to bring the perpetrator towards repentance (Luke 17:3-4).

We are commanded to forgive, no doubt about it.  If someone asks for forgiveness many, MANY times, then we are to keep forgiving.  When we forgive, we are making a commitment to no longer hold that person's sin against them, just as God no longer holds our sin against us.  But the book argues that goal of forgiveness is reconciliation.  It is an active thing between two parties...not something someone does in the quietness of their heart without making any sort of attempt to approach the other person.

Now I know that full reconciliation may not always be possible.  Trust may be lost.  For example, a parent might forgive a pedophile who tried to harm their children, but that doesn't mean they have to let them near their children again.  As mentioned earlier, forgiveness does not automatically eliminate all consequences of sin.  This is not a punishment from God, but how God disciplines, trains and teaches His children (punishment and discipline are NOT the same).  Sometimes you may not be able to confront the person.  Maybe you don't know how to contact them.  Maybe they are dead.  Maybe the offence is minor and can be overlooked.  Sometimes you just have try to let go and let God deal with it.

One thing the book (and my own experience) has taught me was that therapeutic forgiveness does not bring peace and an end to bitterness.  While the main goal of forgiveness is not inner peace for myself, I feel more at peace when I know I've done my best to approach the person and sort it out.  However they respond, I can know that God has it in control, that He sees all, and that He is the one who will avenge.  Despite feelings of anger and hurt, He enables me to pray for that person, and to treat them graciously.  The command to love our enemies and do good to those who mistreat us, and the enabling of the Holy Spirit in us to carry out these commands is the cure for bitterness.

The church as a whole really needs to stop sticking their heads in the sand, and start helping people forgive and reconcile as properly as possible.  We are called to be peacemakers, however tiring and seemingly petty some people's grievances may be.  We need to take sin seriously and call people to repent as well as to forgive.

If you only read one other book this year...read this one!

Quote of the Day

Forgiving costs us our sense of justice.  We all have this innate sense deep within our souls, but it has been perverted by our selfish, sinful natures.  We want to see 'justice' done, but the justice we envision satisfies our own interests.  We must realise that justice has been done.  God is the only rightful administrator of justice in all of creation, and His justice has been satisfied.  In order to forgive our brother, we must be satisfied with God's justice and forego the satisfaction of our own.
- Jerry Bridges

Revenge

Season 1 of Revenge finished last night.

For those who haven't watched the show, it's about a young woman whose father was framed, convicted (and later murdered) for a heinous crime he didn't commit back when she was a girl.  Years later, she returns to the Hamptons under a new name to exact revenge on the people who were behind it all.

The series had me hooked, yet left a bitter taste in my mouth at the same time.  Duncan remarked that he's so glad we're not part of society's elite where kisses are bestowed, but everyone secretly plots to destroy one another.

I can understand why Amanda/Emily would want revenge.  I've never been grievously wronged as she had and had my whole life destroyed.   I would be sorely tempted to take matters into my own hands as she does.  But it disturbed me when one of the main characters says vengeance is justified if the person deserved it, and if they didn't, then you just have to forgive yourself.  Watching this show made me more determined to trust in God and leave things in His hands, even if my sinful nature is screaming for me to take revenge.

Did anyone else watch it?

Diary of an Incubator: FAQs

Five years ago, I started the series Diary of a Wedding Planning Machine to record the highs and lows of engagement and wedding planning.

Now that I'm pregnant, I'm starting a new series....Diary of an Incubator.

Doesn't that sound exciting! ;)

One similar thing about getting engaged and being pregnant is that you get asked a lot of questions.  Mostly this is fine; people are just curious.  But five minutes after we got engaged, I was being asked about our wedding plans.  Where were going to hold the ceremony and reception?  How many people were we going to invite?  Ummm we got engaged five minutes ago!  Let us enjoy the moment.  Patience, people, patience.

So, I've decided to answer a list of common pregnancy-related questions...onces I've already been asked, and ones I'm anticipating in the near future.

Where are you having the baby?
You can't have babies in the hospital near where we live so we're going to have the baby in Perth.  Country women get asked to go away two weeks before their due date, so I'll be heading to Perth in early January to do the 'countdown' (in case the baby comes early).  That means I'll need to stay with someone for at least a fortnight.  Hmmm I'll be seeking out someone with airconditioning.

Public or private?
Private for the first.  We're very grateful to be able to go private.  I doubt we'll be able to afford it if (God willing) there's a second.  But finding an obstetrician was hard.  It's like some women book before they're even pregnant!

Are you having a boy or a girl?
Don't know and we won't be finding out.  We like surprises.  We thought we might be having twins since Duncan's mum is a twin and there are numerous other sets of twins in both families.  But, no, the ultrasound revealed there is only one (Duncan is very relieved).  The ultrasound revealed it IS a baby...not a monkey...or a dog...although the baby did look a bit like an alien.

Are you excited/nervous/*insert some other emotion here*?
Yes, all of the above.

Have you had any morning sickness?
Yes, although I haven't thrown up, thank goodness (I HATE vomiting...it's a phobia of mine).  I just feel nauseous on and off most days.  It's at its worst just before I go to bed (it should be called night sickness).  Having the flu made the sickness a lot worse.

How are you going with the low starch diet?
I'm not.  I'm off the diet.  I'll write a post about pregnancy and arthritis later.

Have you had any strange cravings?
Nope, nothing weird like icecream and gerkins.  I've just been craving dry, salty things like chips, pies, toast and vegemite etc.  I liked all of these things in my pre-diet days, and now I can have them, I'm making up for lost time.

Do you have a bump?
Yes, it's starting.

No doubt there will be more questions to add to the list as the months go by...

I Did It...Eventually

Back in 2009, I mentioned that I had started studying towards Certificate 2 in Business at TAFE.  This was part of my aim to find administration work after I quickly learned there are no opportunities for librarians in small country towns.

The plan had always been to do it slowly...three units per semester (towards a total of 12) and one semester per year.  Coupled with numerous stuff ups with my enrolment (they sent me no books on one occasion, and double the number of books on another, then they nearly made me repeat a unit because of a problem their end), it's a miracle I completed it.

To some people, it may have seemed ridiculous that I was taking so long to do a very basic course.  Just cram as many units into the year as possible, a friend suggested.  No, I did it slowly because I was studying externally and determined not to get stressed over it.

It took three and a bit years....but I did it!

Jethro

We had the privilege of meeting our friends Emma and Peter's new baby son, Jethro, a few weeks ago.  He was born on the 21st June.

He is a seriously cute little dude!

Big sister Eleanor was more interested in poking him in the face while he was sleeping.

Here is the little fella at eight days new.

Which camera do I look at?

Practising for January